Run of the Millers

We've Moved!

2009-12-08T18:24:00.000-08:00

In an effort to consoladate our blogs, we've moved them to a new server. They can all be found at http://blog.caffeinatednerd.com.

2009-08-10T13:34:00.000-07:00

I got a call from Linnea's doctor this morning with the results of an ultrasound we had done last week. I was born with hip dysplasia, and had wear a corrective brace for nine months as an infant. Because hip dysplasia is a genetic defect, we have been careful to screen our children for it. However, since Iris showed no sign of the defect, I assumed Linnea would be exempt from my genes as well. Unfortunately, this is not the case. My happy, carefree baby was found to have a mild case. The doctor assured me over the phone that this was nothing to worry about, it just meant a few x-rays, and the vast majority of babies who have this are fine with no treatment; it just works itself out on its own. I had a worse case than Linnea does, and, as Josh reminded me, I'm a runner. So everything should be fine and dandy.
But then, why do I hurt so much? I've been on the verge of tears all day, have completely lost my appetite (something that I've found happens when my kids are sick or I'm worried about their health), and can't seem to get it off of my mind. I think there is a kind of hurt that you can experience as a mom that no one else can understand. Even if you know everything is going to be okay, there is a deep internal pang that overrides everything, and almost feels as though a giant lump is taking the place of all of your internal organs. Yes, it's that physical of a feeling. You find that all you want for your kids is for them to be happy, for no hardship to stand in their way, whether or not it would be good for them. I know the logic--life has trials and we learn from them, so my kids need them, too. But that's not how I feel. You can try all you like to create a safe place where your children will feel nothing but happiness, and life and the world intrude. I suppose all we can do is equip them to deal well with life, to make the best out of every situation. Perhaps this is more a learning experience for me than anything. I just wish learning wasn't so hard.

Projects Forever Undone

2009-08-05T22:53:00.000-07:00

I have carefully chosen fabric for a summer outfit for Linnea.
And one for Iris.
And fresh peaches waiting to be made into some sort of culinary treat.
And a box of freshly picked tomatoes and peppers that I still haven't decided how to use.
And a sweater that I've been knitting for 4 years now that was going to be for a friend, then for Iris, now for Linnea, and may not even be ready for her.
And a stack of books about a foot high, borrowed and recently purchased, all of which I swear I'm going to read next.
And a novel that I am working on.
And too much homemade yogurt to be consumed in the allotted time, needing another purpose.
And photography books that I need to research.
And many other things that I'm sure I'm forgetting now, but will haunt me when I remember them.
Does it ever stop? Do I ever say "no" to the accumulation of projects? Do I ever refuse a craft or creation that sounds intriguing? Of course not! I am Supermom! Hear me roar.
However, the other part of the question is this: Do I ever actually get any of it done?
This summer has been better than most in respect to my creative processes. I have written a whole chapter in my book as well as explored other ideas, I have *gasp* used my entire collection of fresh fruit to make new and interesting foods without letting (hardly) any go to waste, I have even helped Josh get our business going. But the list goes on. And I keep adding to it.
I think it's some sort of addiction. If I always have projects and places where I am needed, I will never outlive my usefulness, right? But instead of feeling this way, I usually simply end up feeling overwhelmed and frustrated with myself for not being a better housekeeper, mom, writer, cook, creator. I constantly think, "if only I had more time." But the strange thing is, I remember thinking that when I only hand Iris. And when I didn't have kids. And even when I didn't have a job. I think it's a constant part of my personality to overload my days and always wish for more time.
So, I suppose the moral of the story is to do as much as I can enjoy doing, and not get upset over the things that fall through the cracks. The most important thing about this time is that I can watch my beautiful girls grow up, not sew them an outfit they will never remember wearing! This time is short, and I'm working on focusing my efforts toward improving their quality of life and building great memories. I suppose that's why my list will truly forever remain undone!

Growly Bear

2009-08-02T23:37:00.000-07:00

If you are wondering why I am posting so often all of a sudden, it's for two reasons. First of all, I told you I would. =) Secondly, I've agreed to a Write Fifteen Minutes A Day challenge hosted by Laurie Halse Anderson, and when it's this late by the time I get around to it, I don't really want to work on my WIP. So you, dear readers, get to hear my rants. =)
I thought I would dedicate this post to my beautiful Linnea. Not that I want to exclude Iris, but she maintained control of the blog for a year and a half, so it's time for her to share the spotlight. I may have mentioned before how much more interactive Linnea is becoming. This is most evident in her pre-crawling efforts. That's right, I said pre-crawling. A four-month-old. How is it that I seem to get the strong, active ones? I knew she had begun to move around her crib a lot at night, especially after she learned to roll over. You know how the doctors tell you constantly to put your baby on their back to sleep? I'd like them to come to my house and tell me how it's done. Neither of my children has slept on their back since they were three months old. It doesn't matter how many times I roll her onto her back, Linnea immediately pops around to her more preferred position. And then she crawls. Or scoots. Or whatever you want to call pushing with her back feet and pulling with her arms. She can't get her belly up yet (and with as much milk as she's been drinking lately, it's no wonder!), but she does all she can to move around to whatever she wants. The other day I watched her progress from her playmat to the carpet and back again in a period of about 30 minutes. I'm in for trouble with the two of them!
Linnea has also become quite a chatterbox. Though Iris now talks nonstop, I don't remember her being quite so talkative at this stage. I wonder what that means for my future. Hmmm. But Linnea doesn't only resort to cooing and laughing (she has the most infectious laugh you can imagine!), she now growls. Like a bear. She makes better bear and lion sounds than Iris herself! These aren't angry growls, by any means, but rather happy ones. It is hilarious, though, to be looking into the happy, contented face of my young baby and hearing a low, gutteral growl emerge.
I always worried about having two. I had so many insecurities about loving and enjoying another as much as I love and enjoy Iris. But even though I'm not a baby person, it's somehow different when you have your own. It's crazy, but I'm having the time of my life!

Fair Time!

2009-08-02T00:22:00.000-07:00

Today we took our first family trip to the fair. After talking about taking Iris to the state fair, with a complete lack of enthusiasm from both Josh and I (feeling guilty all the while because we should, of course, want to take her), Josh drove by the Benton County fairgrounds one day to find that they were setting up for the county fair. I don't know if I've ever actually been to a county fair. I've dropped off 4-H projects, but never, to my knowledge, stayed for the experience. I always believed county fairs to be a place of livestock, crafts, and complete boredom. However, I was either wrong, or our county is just fantastic. I now wonder why we ever even considered going to the state fair. Here, you have all of the animals, rides, food, and even rodeo (it wouldn't be Oregon without it!) that the state fair offers, but on a smaller scale. And it's even close to home! As a parent of young kids, this makes it especially appealing.
We decided to introduce Iris to the fun and excitement of fair rides. They had it all--the carousel, the giant slide, the plastic hot-air balloons that get three feet off of the ground. However, my fun-loving, never-scared-of-anything go-getter decided 2/3 of the way into the carousel that she was done for the day. At least it was long enough for a picture.

Linnea did quite well despite the temperatures in the 90's and the complete lack of any naps. But all the heat and overtiredness got to her eventually, and she slept--through the bells and whistles and shrieking kids, she slept. Though she woke up as soon as we put her in peace and quiet and coolness of the car. Go figure.

Iris did appreciate the animals, though (there was even an exhibit with reptiles, a giant tortoise, and a lion cub), and Josh and I took advantage of the nearness of the fair to home. After the kids were in bed, we called some friends over to watch them and headed back to ride a few rides ourselves. All in all, though, it was a lot of fun, and I think, for a few years at least, we'll stay on the small scale.

Five Things on a Friday

2009-07-31T13:23:00.001-07:00

I've decided to take a page out of the blog of Cynthia Lord, and combine it with a page from The Short Years. I'm making a quick recap of highlights of my week, hopefully a Friday tradition from now on.
1. Linnea had her four-month doctor appointment yesterday! I can't believe she's that old already--it seems like forever and just yesterday all at the same time. She weighed in at 13lbs. 9.5 oz, and is now 24 inches long. I think she's catching up with Scott and Melody's one-month-old, Liam, now! Among other topics, we discussed starting solid food in a month! How is it possible? Not that I'm objecting, or anything. =)
2. We are in the midst of potty-training with Iris. It's going very well, actually. But I haven't purchased training pants yet, because they're so expensive! At $13 a piece (and I figure that I'll need 5), it's a pretty hefty bill. This is the whole reason you have more than one child, right? To get more use out of all the expensive baby paraphernalia!
3. I finished a book this week. That may not sound like much to write about, but I've been working on The Secret River since before Linnea was born. It was phenomenal! Amazing writing, great story, and even though I usually have a difficult time with Australian fiction, it has to be one of my favorites! Now on to The Time Traveler's Wife. Any bets on whether I'll finish it before the movie comes out on the 14th?
4. We met with my brother last night to discuss logos for our new business. It's an exciting step for us, but difficult to decide for certain what we are looking for. I came up with a great idea (yay, me!), so we'll see what the mock-ups look like in a couple of weeks!
5. I made homemade yogurt for the first time this week! It was such an amazing thing to realize that it's possible to do it on your own--no magic involved! It didn't get Iris-approval until I mixed it with some homemade blueberry jam, but all in all, it's going to save me a fortune on yogurt. Normally, we get YoBaby! for $4 for 6-1/2 cup servings. My batch made 8 cups with half a gallon of milk (even with the expensive Lochmead stuff, this is about $2). Hooray!

Positives and Negatives

2009-07-30T13:28:00.000-07:00

As I am sure that you have noticed, if you follow my blog with any sort of regularity, that I have been especially negligent about writing since Linnea was born. I can blame this on the kids all I want, but the truth of the matter is that I haven't made time for writing. During the last couple of days, however, I have stumbled upon some truly inspirational blogs, and so, for the present moment, I am determined to once again keep up.
Things have been challenging around here lately, as Iris has prematurely entered her twos. Every question is always answered with an emphatic "no!", whether she actually wants the option she is given or not. Lately, "bye-bye" has replaced "no" as a surer sign of her negative feelings. Lately this phrase has encroached on things that most of us wouldn't think of leaving behind. The other day she hit her head on the crib. She kept repeating "bonkers, head" until I acknowledged that she had hurt her head, at which point she said, "bye-bye, head". That would be a tough one. This morning I told her that we should put pigtails in her hair because it would be cute. She responded, "bye-bye cute!" She may not care about looking cute, but look who won the pigtails debate!

Linnea, on the other hand, has been growing ever more positive. Right now she is contented to lay right beside me giving me happy little growls. As I seem to have the active ones, she loves jumping. We discovered this when she started to laugh hysterically at Iris' jumping. So we tried it with her--success! Sometimes I think Linnea's smiles are what get me through the days right now.
One reason I haven't been writing much lately is because summer has turned me into a domestic goddess. Not that you could tell by my perpetually messy house, but hey, we goddesses have more creative things to do than clean houses! This year I have entered into the full swing of summer's bounty and gone out picking every type of fruit I can find. This has loaded me down with several pounds of strawberries and blueberries that I then have had to figure out how to use. Luckily, my ambition has lead me to create jams, shortcakes, fruit leather, and muffins, which will all hopefully last until next summer. I think by then I will have learned that I actually need to pick a lot more next year!
My domestication this year has also led to the beginning of a small photography business. Don't get me wrong--you wouldn't want me behind the camera. Being a non-techy person, I hate all the details involved with good picture-taking. But Josh loves it, and I have a pretty good eye for posing and composition. And so, we are launching Caffeinated Nerd Photography. I'll keep you posted on how it goes.
So, that's it for catching up with summer! We'll see how it goes from here on out! And I will leave you with a video of giggles from my happy one!

The blessed moments of peace and quiet

2009-06-26T14:52:00.000-07:00

The house is a mess, I should be packing for the trip to the coast we're leaving for tonight, or cleaning, or doing just about anything but writing, but the fact is that my house is quiet. It's amazing what a brain can do when its thoughts can be heard!
The fact is that the normal noise level in our home has elevated this week due to the fact that a certain someone seems to be entering the "terrible twos", four months early. Yes, yesterday my fun-loving, cute-as-can-be child erupted into that screaming, throw-yourself-on-the-ground monster that every parent-to-be swears their children will never be like. Luckily, there are a few "I've been there" parents around who know what you're going through. As one person said on a blog I just read, it's as if "[t]he formerly cute baby in my arms had suddenly morphed into a red-faced, furious monster. Kind of like Jack-Jack at the end of 'The Incredibles.'"
It began when we had to leave The Play Factory. I had already had a rough morning. The library's annual Teddy Bear Picnic had been written on my calendar for weeks, and I was looking forward to spending quality time with my girls. We wrestled out the door with teddy bears in hand, only to leave the house 30 minutes after the concert started. Clearly I have not figured out how long to allow for getting two little ones out the door. Once we arrived at the park, there was no parking close by, meaning that we would get to the concert 45 minutes late. Considering that it was a children's concert, I thought the likelihood of having music for more than one hour was slim. Feeling like a failure, I called Josh on the phone and cried to him about what a bad mom I am. He suggested The Play Factory.
The Play Factory is a wonderful playroom set up in a local toy store. This is one of those toy stores that is fun to look around in, but hard to buy anything from because of the exhorbitant prices. However, their playroom includes all of these toys, with only the cost of $3.50 per visit. Iris loves it there. She loves it so much, that she never wants to leave. Thus, the extreme tantrum that left me with no choice other than to take her out to the car and head home immediately, instead of buying her the one thing inside that I was originally planning getting for her. My embarrassment was probably as apparent to the other moms looking at us as her screams were to the whole store and I carried her, arm around her waist with Linnea's carseat in my other hand, out the door.
What happened to make my easygoing, fun-loving child blow up like Vesuvius? I called my mom in tears a few weeks ago for the assurance that this is normal. Even though it is, however, it doesn't make it easier. No one told me that I would hate disciplining my child, that it would hurt when she would disobey and refuse to apologize. I guess that's what we get for loving. Along with the incredible joy that comes with children are the times of heartache. I wouldn't give any of it up to spare the pain, but that doesn't make it too much easier. Even so, while Iris is going through this difficult stage, I do get to look at Linnea and realize that it will be a little while before we have to deal with her in the same way. This makes me savor the her smiles much more, and makes the happy times with Iris even more precious.

Getting to Know You

2009-06-04T15:52:00.000-07:00

I am sitting here in the peace and quiet (finally). Actually, it’s not so peaceful or quiet, with the windows open and the wind and rain tearing through the neighborhood, and the thunder crashing. But those are very peaceful sounds when you are used to two young kids who together usually make even more of a racket.
Even while the two little ones make a lot of noise together, I’ve found that I have a relatively quiet new one. Iris has always been loud and demanding, and I suppose that I had prepared myself for another in the same vein. Linnea has surprised me. It’s not as though she doesn’t cry at all—she does when she’s hungry or really wants to be held (she wants to be held all of the time, but she only cries for it sometimes), or when she wants to sleep (she’s a bit more sensitive to sleep than Iris ever was). But she’s not demanding. In fact, she’s rubbish at crying. We noticed this right from the get-go. When she works herself up, her voice gives out. It’s a bit pathetic, really, but so cute. You actually feel quite bad for her crying, so it’s rare to feel frustrated with her at all. Besides the fact that she never went through a crying-for-no-reason-we-could-discover phase the way Iris (and most babies) did. It’s wonderful to be able to understand what she wants the majority of the time!
I found out just how little Linnea cries yesterday at her two-month check up. I have not been looking forward to this appointment at all—I remember Iris’ first shots, and the betrayed look she gave me while screaming in pain. It made me cry to see my baby like this, and I was dreading seeing my second go through this as well. I held her on the table, feeling like a traitor, while the nurse held down her legs. The nurse gave the first shot. Linnea looked at me, her forehead wrinkling. The nurse gave her the second shot. Still not a peep. Only after the nurse started putting the band-aids on did Linnea’s bottom lip begin to stick out in a desperately sad look. But that was it—no crying, at least not from her. I cried while she looked at me curiously, but I was incredibly relieved that she didn’t seem to mind the shots too much. We’ll see what happens next week when we have to go back in for two more.

We also got a great sleeper in Linnea. I always thought that Iris was a good sleeper—sleeping through the night at nine months, waking up sometimes when I go in to check on her, but always saying “night-night” and going straight back to sleep. She has nothing on Linnea. For a week now, Linnea has been sleeping through the night. And I’m not talking the six-hour sleeping through the night. I’m talking about putting her to bed at 8 pm, and not waking up until 6 or 7 the next morning. Ah, bliss. How did I get so lucky? Who could ask for more from a two-month-old? Even before that, she had been sleeping that same pattern for about two or three weeks, only waking once at night. It’s been ages since I slept so well.
It’s been fun so much fun to get to know Linnea. I had so many worries about having a second—worries about not loving another as much, about not having enough time for her. But I’m finding that those worries are disappearing, and I’m enjoying being a mom of two even more than I enjoyed being a mom of one. And even though I definitely appreciate the current quiet, I appreciate the girls I was blessed with more than I could ever say. They are the light of my life. Sorry to all of you other moms out there, but I have the two best kids that have ever lived on this earth.

Monkey see. . .

2009-05-18T13:19:00.000-07:00

I have recently noticed a sometimes fun, sometimes startling tendency that Iris has grown into: mimicry. Not only is she repeating absolutely EVERYTHING we say, but she is also doing all of the things she sees us doing. Luckily, this hasn't turned out too badly yet, but it certainly reminds us to stay on our toes. There is nothing more convicting about what we say and do than realizing that your own little one will be saying and doing the same things. So far, the only bad thing that I've noticed is that every time Iris finds a Q-tip, she tries to clean her ears--as this can be rather dangerous, we keep a close eye on every Q-tip! I'm sure there are more bad habits to come that we don't notice in ourselves yet, but maybe this will actually cause us to grow.
The good, or at least cute, that she has really picked up on is my interactions with Linnea. Iris isn't one to attach to specific stuffed animals so the "baby" changes every day. Sometimes it's her mouse, sometimes Disney Bear, and sometimes her Cabbage Patch doll. The only qualification required is availability. Once she's picked out her baby, she goes through a whole series of mothering duties, including burping the baby (complete with a "burp" sound), rocking, strapping it in the carseat or swing (or both), and today she added on giving her baby tummy time. I even had my mom tell me how she held her Cabbage Patch doll to help it walk, and even cheered and clapped its hands for a job well done.
So with my awareness of the little eyes that are watching me, hopefully I'll learn to set a good example!

Wild Corvallis

2009-04-23T13:55:00.001-07:00

One thing that I love about being back in Corvallis is how we exist fairly peacefully with nature here. Obviously we have the concrete and buildings which invade the wild, and I (as well as MANY other Corvallists) am bitter about Legend Homes building unnecessary McMansions (which, because of the low demand, they have only carved out the space and not built anything yet)over one of my favorite hiking paths. But for the most part, Corvallis is a very green town. On sunny days like we have had this week, everyone is out in their yard doing yardwork. None of this "hire a landscaper California-Style" for us! Instead, an amazing number of people have a wealth of knowledge about horticulture. Lucky for us, two of our neighbors are experts. We are constantly receiving gifts from various gardens, as well as being offered plants that our neighbors uproot. We try to return the favor, but as of yet, we lack the expertise!

I was reminded about Corvallis' wild side twice this week. On the happier note, as I was driving home this afternoon from Josh's work, traffic on a major street was stopped to let a small herd of deer cross--into our old apartment complex. This is by no means a rare occurance, and I always love taking Iris for walks out to that Northwest neighborhood and pointing out deer, rabbits, and other wildlife to her.

However, we did have a negative effect of the wild this week. Or, rather, a sad effect. We have a resident cougar in a neighborhood somewhat close to us. The neighborhood is across the highway from us, but it's not that unreasonable to keep a look out here, too. I'm used to cougar watches in the Northwest neighborhood, as it's so much closer to MacDonald Forest (OSU's research forest), but was surprised to hear that this cougar was within 300 yards of Wilson School, the elementary school closest to us. Now, I'm all for saving wildlife, and realize that it's our fault as a society that these wildcats are coming into town--we're invading their territory rather than them invading ours. However, I have found that I have developed something of a "mother bear" temperament, and now am against anything that might threaten my family. It's interesting, but it gives me a look at the way the pioneers must have seen nature--instead of same great pastoral view, they would have seen everything as a threat. It's amazing what kids will do to change your outlook!

But we're not changing any of our habits. Here in Oregon, cougars and other wildlife are a part of life--you simply take precautions. So we celebrated the short (but promising!) return of the sun by going to different parks. Iris has become quite a brave soul, and now goes down slides on her own.

I think she even shamed her friend Colin into going down on his own yesterday. He was pretty hesitant until she had slid down a few times. Linnea, on the other hand, seems to follow her mother's philosophy and just sit back and soak in the sun:

Too bad it's raining today. But the weathermen are optimistic, and so am I!

A Glimpse of my Future

2009-04-06T20:24:00.000-07:00

Though I promised myself to try writing every day, I did take what I would assume to be a fully justified break--Linnea Coraline will be one week old tomorrow. But with the realization that I still have a napping toddler and a newborn who sleeps a lot also came the realization that I need, now more than ever, to take time for myself. So, once again, I am working to reorganize my life (scary how frequently that happens!).

This morning I got a taste of my life that is to come. Because Linnea is a bit jaundiced (though her numbers are beginning to come down, praise God), the doctor wanted to see her at one week rather than the normal two. The first thing I learned was to never make a Monday morning appointment (though I somehow immediately forgot this and made the same appointment for next week). The office was crazy--I've never seen it so busy! I had a stack of medical history and insurance forms to fill out while Josh kept an eye on Iris who kept trying to play with a little girl who had a cold. Suddenly, my mind went blank. The question? "Mother's age". I couldn't remember. And not only could I not remember, but I couldn't figure it out. I can usually do the math to add up my age, but somehow all of my math abilities went out the window with my final. (For the record, I got an "A" in the class while pregnant; quite an achievement for my 20%brain reduction!) I kept adding with difficulty, but couldn't figure out how 1982 to 2008 could only equal 26. If I was 25 when Iris was born, how could I only be 26 a year and a half later? After much convincing, Josh assured me that the numbers were correct.

But the busy waiting room, sick kids, and brain malfunctions were only the beginning. Once in the office, Iris began hamming it up for our entertainment. Among other things, she decided to sit sideways in Linnea's car seat and rock it back and forth. We are probably bad parents for laughing at something we've been trying to get her not to do, but that's what we did, and thus encouraged her. While Josh was busy at the scales with Linnea who, finding her diaper removed, took the opportunity to do her business, Iris decided to try the car seat trick once more. This resulted in her tripping over the side and falling onto the floor in tears. With both little ones crying, I attempted to calm Iris and Josh did the same with Linnea. Then of course, the doctor came in and upset Linnea even more with her exam. While Linnea cried Iris wore a very serious and worried look on her face (she really is doing well as a big sister). The funny thing was the Linnea cried less when the drew blood from her heel for the fifth time this week, than when the doctor listened to her heartbeat. At least we were spared more incidents by the time we left--or at least there were none that my fried brain can recall!

As we left the office, we joked about how chaotic we had just realized our lives have become. But, amidst the chaos, at least we will have good stories.

Copycat

2009-03-19T15:49:00.000-07:00

We have entered the days of mimicry in our house. Not that this is necessarily a bad thing--actually,it's usually quite cute. Iris has taken to repeating all sorts of things that we say, and now she has extended her talents of observation and imitation to things that we do. She has been working on this for awhile; several weeks ago I picked her up from Grandma's house after my class, only to have Grandma ask me when we had taught her to sing "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star." I was very confused. I'm not a big fan of kids songs or music (Raffi is about all that I can take), so I don't really know how she would be overexposed to that particular song. We make up our own songs, and sing those that we find entertaining (Mahna Mahna, for example). But Grandma swore that the cadence sounded right, and she kept saying "uppabuppa" (up above the). I wrote it off, knowing that she was working a lot on the words "apple" and "up", which often blended into one: "uppa". However, I awoke yesterday morning to her singing in her crib, along with Raffi's lullaby CD (that's how I didn't know she was actually exposed to that song--I never listen to the CD). Sure enough, "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" was playing, and she had added at least one word to the song: "tickle, tickle". But that is not the only song Iris now has in her repertoire. She now also sings "Mahna Mahna", to our great delight, and it sounds like "mama dododo". It's pretty funny, and great for car entertainment!

This morning, I found that she not only mimics words (which has been going on for awhile now) and music, but also actions. On mornings where I sleep in until she gets up, I try to exercise while she eats her breakfast. This is not always successful. This morning, she decided to eat her yogurt quickly, and then wanted down with me. So I let her down and kept doing my "Yoga Fat Burn". She soon began to watch the people on tv (she's pretty fascinated, especially as we almost NEVER let her even look at a tv). When the instructor began doing squats, Iris started bending her knees. When the instructor went into the Warrior pose, Iris' hands went out to her sides. And when the instructor had her palms touch over her head, Iris did the same. I wish I could have gotten a picture! The only thing that worries me, is that she wasn't imitating me in any way. In fact, she wasn't interested in watching me do the same things at all. Instead, she did whatever the person on tv did. Perhaps it's a good thing that we have a tv ban!

Good Moods

2009-02-19T12:02:00.000-08:00

One thing that constantly amazes me about being a mom is how the mood of your child can affect your own. Obviously, if your child is in a bad mood, it definitely influences your outlook, but the same actually happens for me when Iris is in a good mood. I woke up this morning grumpy. This is really not a usual thing for me. Though I'm not a morning person, after I wake up, I have a generally good outlook on the day. However, not only am I worn out by this third trimester, but Josh's new job makes him get up and leave earlier (and I'm trying to get up at the same time so that I can have time to exercise in the mornings). And, I have a cold, which has been nagging at me for the past week. So I woke up rather exhausted, only to walk out into the house and find that the hours I spent doing dishes yesterday meant nothing, because I still have a pile overflowing the sink today--we desperately need a dishwasher! This sent me into a brooding mood, thinking about how my days as a stay-at-home mom now consist of cleaning the same things over and over every day. But I couldn't brood for long, as Iris and I had to be at her toddler class a little early this morning for a field trip. I went to get her up, and this picture is what I saw. She had a huge smile on her face, and all of her hair was sticking straight up. It's amazing to me that she has as much hair as she does in the first place, but that hair is so fine and wild and gravity-defying that it constantly gives me cause to laugh.
My cheerful girl helped me a little as I scrambled to get ready, but my day still kept going downhill. All, of course, little things like hurting my hand on the edge of the pergo flooring that the previous owners put ON TOP of the laminate that was already there (and, for the millionth time, wondering what they were thinking when they made their "improvements" to the house), but all things added up, I was not happy when we left. This abruptly changed when we arrived at the Little Gym. Iris took a couple of minutes to warm up to the other kids, but then she was off. I was actually very surprised at her skill level. She is one of the youngest kids in her class, separated by at least 4 months from the older children. However, she keeps up with them. She was very excited to find the balance beam, which she walked repeatedly holding only one of my hands. She also was very excited to try hanging from the bars when she saw the older kids doing it, and though she doesn't yet have the strength to hold on, loved the attempts. It was so much fun to watch her run around and explore the equipment, much braver than most of the children to try new things, that by the time we left, I was downright cheerful.
That was until I ran my errands. It seems like bad days simply plague you, and I had more than the normal share of the usual frustrations of shopping in a small town with a toddler. I also found out the price of the Little Gym (which seems criminal in this economy), which put a damper on my mood. So when grumpy Mommy and Iris returned home, I was ready for my down time. I decided to try to put Iris down for her nap a little early (she no longer sleeps in the morning, but she was really tired after the gym), and when I set her in her crib, she sat down and began to hug her pirate doll. Of course, this didn't last until I could get my camera, but it was sweet to see my daughter, who doesn't cuddle at all, snuggle with her doll. Sentimental as I am, I would say it was heartwarming. She continued to play and giggle while I tried to take a non-blurry picture, and even after I left the room, she sang and laughed with her toys. Leaving her in a good mood somehow changed my own, and she even inspired me to write instead of doing housework. Her good mood keeps putting this day back on track, keeping it from becoming too overwhelming for me. There are days when I feel like it's all I can do to carry myself through the endless hours, and then there are days when somehow, my little one-year-old carries us both.

The Small Insanities of Pregnancy

2009-01-09T16:30:00.000-08:00

Pregnancy comes with more than its share of brain-dead moments, much to the delight of my husband, who loves to recount my various befuddlements and mishaps. Up until this point, I have considered it something of a triumph to have thus far escaped tragic and brainless happenings during this pregnancy. My car has escaped unscathed, I have only left my paid-for groceries in the store once, and I leave my purse in the car while shopping once every week or so--a big improvement over the last time. Until today. I suppose each pregnancy has to have its "crazy" story, and our soon-to-arrive little one is responsible for this one.
I had just left the library with my stack of books and a somewhat grumpy Iris. I went through the normal routine of putting her in her carseat, fastening all of the little latches and buckles. Iris put on her usual act of crabbiness at getting strapped in, a tradition that we go through ever single car ride, so I grabbed whatever entertaining thing I could find close at hand: my keys. Iris has always loved my keys, especially since she learned to honk the car with the little buttons. With the little squirrel finally strapped in securely, I attempted to take back the bribe. She was having none of it. So, I thought, I'll go around to the driver's side and have her give me the keys once I get in--she's usually more compliant if I ask for things then. I closed her door, and as I began to walk to the driver's side, I heard it: "Click, HONK!" She had locked herself in.
I couldn't believe I had done it. How could I have given her the means to lock herself in the car, knowing that she loves to push the lock button? I started pacing back and forth, thinking of what to do, almost in tears--not from worry, but from extreme embarrassment. In fact, I wasn't worried at all--Josh works two blocks from the library, and Iris was perfectly happy, ecstatic even, with what she had done. As she sat there repeatedly honking the car and giving great belly-laughs every time I looked at her, the woman in the car next to me took pity. She lent me her cell phone so that I wouldn't have to call from inside the library, but as I talked to Josh and asked him to rescue me, he began laughing so hard that I could barely tell him where we were. After waiting five or so minutes for him to unlock the car, standing in the parking lot like an idiot while my toddler repeatedly honked the car and laughed hysterically at me, Josh arrived and informed me of my entertainment value to his coworkers. "It was perfect, they all really needed a laugh," he informed me. It's great to know that my embarrassment provided some with a bright spot in their day.
So there is my story for this pregnancy. At least it isn't as apparent and permanent as the dent in the truck from my pregnancy with Iris. But what would this lovely nine-month season be without it's little moments of insanity--and giving others great stories to tease you for later?

National Blog Posting Month

2008-11-04T09:34:00.000-08:00

I discovered through a friend's blog this morning that it is National Blog Posting Month, in which you are supposed to blog every day. So will this motivation scheme work on someone like me, who allows a blog to sit, unchanged, for months? Probably not. But hey, it's worth a shot! I will probably be taking a leaf out of my friend's book and post recipes and such. Somehow, even though I'm staying home with Iris (or maybe because of that), I seem to lose the time to blog very easily. But let's see what happens!
First order of business, the birthday party! Yes, it's hard to believe, but my baby girl turned one two weeks ago. If she wasn't constantly asserting her toddlerhood, I probably wouldn't believe it myself. But she's walking and talking (at least in her own cute language), and definitely showing that she is as opinionated as her parents. My mom thinks it's all very funny, the way she keeps us on our toes; apparently she's just the way I was. But despite the growing independence, she's good-natured, constantly smiling, and extremely outgoing. I've never heard of a baby that gets as much attention as Iris does, and I think it's all because she's such a ham and will do anything for smiles. =)
So, anyway, back to the party. We had a pirate party (sorry, no cutesy stuff for us!), and it was lots of fun. Most of our family was there (which makes for a rather crowded house), and we barbequed to the sounds of the pirate music in the background. We had delicious cake while Iris opened her gifts (she really got into the unwrapping--loved to tear the paper the way she's not allowed to at home!), and even showed her first signs of true selfishness around other kids (uh oh!). When she unwrapped the ride-on car that my parents got her, my cousin's son, Bo, wanted to play with it too. Normally, Iris tends to stand aside if other kids want what she has. Not so here. Instead, she pushed Bo away and repositioned herself so that he couldn't get to her toy. Ah, the fun that is ahead!
Iris also got her first taste of cake. Now, many of you may know how strange I am about my food--I do as much organic and whole grain as I can afford to, and now I've even gone to making my own breads and (soon!) pastas so as to avoid store bought. Well, having Iris has only made this worse. I won't even use generic meat or any other animal products anymore for the hormones, a fact which I think drives my mom nuts. =) The entire day before the party, while I was making the cake, I was sick with stress about her eating so many things we had been told to avoid up until now, and all at once--milk, eggs, and sugar. So, paranoid that I am, I made an organic cake to put under that unbelievably sweet decorator's frosting. She barely even touched the cake. Once she discovered icing, that was it. For some reason, she was most attracted to the black flag in the middle of the cake, and rapidly gave herself what looked like pirate stubble. (Oh, and just a note, we didn't make her eat with a spoon the way it looks in the picture. We just gave her one because she likes them.) I was worrying about sugar headaches, sleepless nights, and bad reactions, but she was having a blast. And after all that, she slept through the night, no negative side effects.
After giving Iris a bath and cleaning up my parent's house, we left with more toys than we really will ever need, utterly exhausted. Iris won't remember it, but we'll have great pictures!
As it is election day, I do have to put in a plug to go vote. I am jaded, and don't believe my vote will really count except in local elections, but I still am a firm believer that if you don't vote, you can't complain. So if you're an Oregonian, drop off your ballot (if you haven't already done so--I finally got mine in yesterday--it took us over two hours to go through all the measures and politicians and everything!), and if you live elsewhere, go vote! Okay, so there's my duty done. =)

Work Day

2008-09-24T14:56:00.001-07:00

I’m sitting in a coffee shop, listening to Ingrid Michaelson, and thoroughly enjoying a day off. Grandma Miller has decided to take Iris off of my hands one day each week, and this gives me the welcome opportunity to work (not, of course, for money, like normal people). So I’m spending my days off writing and reading, working on my website (which is now back up—thanks to those who let me know something was wrong!), and researching for my WIP. It’s rather fun. Makes me feel like a real writer!

Things at home have gotten more hectic lately. Iris is in the full swing of walking—complete with crashing into things and pulling down furniture that I had no idea she could reach. On with the baby proofing! She also has, absurdly, in the last two days, refused to respond to “stop”, which is our alternative to “no”. She has been great about obeying lately, but suddenly, our words have no effect. Perhaps it was a weekend during which she was thoroughly spoiled by Grandma and Grandpa. That’s right. We left her for a full weekend for the first time. We went one entire day without seeing her at all. That was tough. But the time was great. Josh’s birthday was on Sunday, and I’d been planning a photography trip for him for a month. We rented a cabin right on the McKenzie River, brought everything to make his favorite home-cooked meals, and loaded up our days with hiking, photography, and general exploring of an area that was new and beautiful. Josh was in raptures all weekend, and even into the week, so I think it was a success! =)

With the coming of fall—wonderful time that that is!—comes another big event for us to add to the holiday season: Iris’ birthday. That’s right, she’s almost a full year old. I can’t believe it. So, on October 17^th, we will be throwing her a big party. Though my mom is not enamored of the theme (girls can certainly have pirate parties, too!), Josh and I are excited and going all out. We have our costumes planned, as well as decorations, a gorgeous cake (she gets her own, of course, that I will make), and lots of family and friends. What can I say? It’s our first child’s first birthday. Can we have much more reason to celebrate?

So, I hope this fall day finds you all warm and cozy much like I am, and if it hasn’t reached you yet (those of you in CA), I’m wishing beautiful changing leaves on you! =)

Progress!

2008-08-19T10:00:00.000-07:00

I usually don't have time to write a whole lot, but as our little family has come down with colds (Iris is the only one who doesn't seem to lose any steam!), I've determined that I have to take it easy today. I didn't feel great yesterday, but as a mom, how do you take a day off? So Josh worked from home to keep from spreading his cold, and I cleaned, and cooked, and did everything I normally do. So, inevitably, today I'm worse. But the house is cleaner (I don't know if I will ever achieve the elusive "clean"), and my energy level is almost nil. So, I'm taking it somewhat easy (its never a complete vacation with an almost-walking 10-month-old prowling around!). I've found that one of the biggest problems with being sick at the same time as the rest of the family is that I can't pass her off to the in-laws or parents, for fear that she will pass the creeping crud off to them. Oh, well!
So, Iris has made some huge progress in the last couple of weeks. After months of discouragement and frustration and trying to guess what we were doing wrong, Iris is now signing. Of course, as she had to know the name of the favorite family member first, she has been signing "doggy" for months. But nothing else. Certainly nothing helpful. But in just the last two weeks, her signing has ramped up. She now raises her hands when she's "all done", puts them together for "more", and sometimes slaps her forehead and chin, which we are hoping means "Daddy" and "Mommy". We would at least like equal standing with the dog. It is so nice to see the fruit of our labors. At least it will give us more encouragement to start more signs--I wasn't going to even try "please" and "thank you" until we got the basics down. Now we can teach her manners!

Summer Days

2008-08-06T12:19:00.000-07:00

Summer is one of life's greatest paradoxes. It is a season when you have much more time at your disposal--no school (if your life is run by the school calendar), longer days, vacation time, etc. However, even with more "time" on our hands, we're always busy. Here in Corvallis we have flung ourselves whole-heartedly into summer and all of its joys. First we went on vacation--the biggest trip we've taken so far. Then, Josh bought me a new, gorgeous bike, which he surprised me with for our 6-year anniversary, along with a night at Eugene's nicest B&B, the Campbell House Inn. Ever since then, we've been biking all over Corvallis, enjoying events like Da Vinci Days, berry picking (Iris appreciates the fresh blueberries, as you can see above--and no, even though I don't like berries, I'm not depriving my child of them!), taking a waterbabies class, and working on our yard. So, it's been a busy summer, which is why you haven't heard from me that much. Also, keeping one step ahead of Iris is growing ever more difficult, as she is now crawling VERY quickly, and cruising around the furniture. She can even walk with her push walker--watch out world! If you would like to read my writing more often, please feel free to check out my Live Journal page, which is where I am concentrating on freewriting and getting back into writing fiction. Just have patience with me--it is primarily freewriting, which means it's unedited (other than spell check). But it feels good to stretch my wings again! I'm actually working on a long story idea, which feels very nice! Happy reading, and happy summer!

Vacation-Boston

2008-06-26T12:33:00.000-07:00

I didn't mean for it to be quite so long between posts. I actually had a post all written up before we left on vacation, but somehow, it didn't quite make it onto the blog. So instead of the boring "we're leaving soon, I can't wait" post, you get the wonderful "this is what we did" post. Aren't you lucky?
I was very proud of our little family on this trip. Before we left, when we told people we were going to the East Coast for two weeks, they would ask if we were bringing Iris (like I'm going to leave my eight-month-old for two weeks!). However, even with her in tow, and all her paraphernalia, we were still able to pack as lightly as I wanted. If there's one thing I know how to do, it's to travel. Pack light, carry everything. We arrived at the airport on Wednesday night with two suitcases, two backpacks, a car seat, and a collapsible stroller. This arrangement was very nice for the ease with which it allowed us to switch between subways, trains, planes, and boats, which we did do quite a lot of. For the most part, the plane trip was quite good. The flight out wasn't full, and the lady at the gate gave us a whole row so that we could bring the car seat on the plane (without paying for the extra seat), and I wouldn't have to hold a sleeping Iris for five hours without moving. This worked out well, even when Iris turned to her preferred position of sleeping on her stomach in the car seat. And even though we were delayed on the tarmac for two hours out of Newark, Iris did remarkably well.
It was raining when we arrived in the Boston area. We were so exhausted from our trip that we walked downtown Concord (a very small area) and called it a day. With rain again the next day (and wondering if this was any better than being back in Oregon), we headed to Salem. Though most of the town has become very touristy with the whole witch-trial thing, we were able to glean some value. We even toured the House of Seven Gables, which got Josh interested in reading the book--a few well-spent dollars!
The following day we had the sun that we'd been hoping for, in abundance. Actually, we hit a heat wave. The temperatures soared into the high 90's, and with that New England humidity, we were drenched in sweat. Luckily, this was the day we decided to further explore Concord (my personal favorite on the entire trip). We visited the Concord branch of Minuteman National Park, which included the Old North Bridge, the site of the "shot heard around the world" and learned about the first skirmish of the Revolution. What interested me was to see the Old Manse--a house built by Emerson's grandfather, inhabited by Hawthorne, with a garden planted by Thoreau--and its proximity to the revolutionary site. Its fun to see the worlds of my imagination collide like that. We then headed out to Sleepy Hollow Cemetery, where we visited the graves of Alcott, Hawthorne, Emerson, and Thoreau. A truly moving experience for me. The day was getting scorchingly hot, but we decided to tour the now air-conditioned house of Louisa May Alcott, where we found how all the writers of Concord were thoroughly interconnected. To finish off the day we cooled off with a swim in Walden Pond (and frightened Iris with the water), and stopped at a roadside stand for fried clams.
Here's the side note about frightening Iris--we wanted to take her swimming, and she was fine in the very shallow water. When we took her a little further, she wasn't too happy, and began to cling to me with everything she had. Then we thought it would be funny for her to watch Josh dunk (the water was a bit chilly), but when he did, she let out the most terrified scream I've ever heard. Since then, she has not been okay with any water other than what's in her ducky bath tub.
So on we went on our journey to Plimouth Plantation, a recreated Pilgrim and Native American village. Very interesting to see the costumed characters and to discuss ways of life with them. And then we came to our final day in the Boston area, in which we decided to travel into Boston itself (we didn't have nearly enough time in this area). So on Monday, we walked the Freedom trail, explored Quincy Market, and arrived too late (for the second time in my life) to tour Paul Revere's house. Oh, yes. And the clam chowder place that I'd been telling Josh about for months (the best clam chowder I've ever had), Jacob Wirth's, was closed the one day we tried it. So, I guess we'll have to go back.
I don't want to bore you with our entire trip in one post, and I'm getting a little tired of writing, so consider this "installment one". I will write more later about Newport and Washington. Now I'm off to enjoy the sun that has finally come to Oregon to stay, and read some professional books (maybe I can sneak The Host in there somewhere!). Oh, and I have all of our pictures up on flickr now, so feel free to view our vacation there.

Changes

2008-04-27T19:44:00.000-07:00

It is amazing to me how Iris is developing and changing right before my eyes. Every day she makes leaps and bounds in her skills, and all I can do is follow her around like paparazzi, trying to catch everything on film (or, rather, digital images). Her newest development? She's almost crawling. On Friday she began to lift herself onto her hands and knees and rock back and forth in an effort to move toward whatever she had her heart set on. And it worked. She didn't actually crawl, but he is, slowly, mobile. She amazes me. I promise I will post a video soon.
Someone (who will remain nameless) told us the other day that it will be really fun when Iris reaches nine months and her personality would emerge. I had nothing to say. What do you say to someone who can't understand that she has been a little person from day one and had personality just as long? I know my daughter, I know what makes her tick, I know how she'll react to things, what things she'll like. She has more personality than is probably good for her, and here, this person is telling me that she has none yet. I'm not a baby person--this is perhaps why I have a difficult time making smalltalk with other moms; I don't really care that much and don't know the different stages. However, I can see just by spending a few minutes with other people's children that they have their own unique personalities, and Iris certainly has hers. Anyway, there's my venting.
Flickr is now accepting videos, so please check there for video of Iris' milestones. Oh, and the pictures are one which I caught of her pushing herself up on her hands and knees, and the other is of the new sweater my godmother made for her. Thank you, Aunt Linda!

It's a Dog-Eat-Dog World!

2008-04-11T10:05:00.001-07:00

Or, at least, a dog-chase-dog-around-the-house-while-baby-is-sleeping, or dog-bark-at-every-little-sound world. This has been the life that Iris and I have lived for the past week. Oscar, my parents' little miniature dachshund, has been visiting, and just went home last night. While I like Oscar (I can tolerate him much more than any other little dog I've ever known), he consistently reminds me that I'm not ready for a puppy. Before Iris was born, Josh gave me permission to get a puppy. I have my heart set on a Weimaraner, or a German Shepherd. However, he though it advisable to wait until after Iris was born, to see how much work I wanted to take on. He was right (oh, crud, don't let him hear me say that! He'll never let it go!). Oscar is two or three, and I'm frazzled by the end of the day with him. Not only does he have little-dog-syndrome and barks at everything, but he has unlimited energy, and picks fights with those he shouldn't. And in the end, he cuddles up to you, completely innocent. Iris, of course, loved having Oscar around. She is a dog-lover from the start, and now she had two dogs to grab the ears of instead of just one. I just will never figure out why, when Oscar licks her face, she sticks out her tongue to meet him!
The illness is starting to pass from our house (as long as Josh doesn't come down with it now!). Thank goodness for the warm weather that is promised. It had better come, as Iris and I are dressed for weather warmer than even predicted. I'm ready to thaw out! Though I've hated Iris' cold, and it has scared me a few times (her first illness), there have been some upsides. She has become unusually cuddly, burying her nose into me and only me. Of course, this means that she accessorizes many of my outfits with a lovely snot trail, and when I have bare shoulders like today, they get covered in very painful hickeys. Someone needs to capture the suction power of babies and market it to vacuum cleaner companies!
I have used my new spare time (during naps and such) to do a few worthwhile activities, such as drowning hours into Facebook and Shelfari, measuring people's love for me by whether or not they had time to post messages. Wow, I never thought I'd be drawn into that crowd, but here I am, hopelessly stuck. So if you also happen to be on either of these websites and I haven't found you yet, please feed my addiction and look me up. =) Actually, the irony is that Shelfari is a book networking site, where you list all of your books and meet others with the same taste. But this same bibliophile site has pulled me away from several hours in which I could be reading. Hmm. . . I did join a 5o book challenge, so I'd better get on that. Iris is down for a nap--happy reading!!

Mommy Time!

2008-03-27T11:43:00.000-07:00

I'm back. After a long absence in order to complete my schoolwork as well as everything else crazy in my life, I have returned for another post. And you might be happy to know that I received A's in both of my classes. I am actually posting right now because it is freezing cold and gloomy outside (it snowed overnight, believe it or not!), and I can't muster the energy to do the housework I know I should be doing. So, I'll get to it later. =)
Things are going well here. As you can see from the picture (and my flickr account), Iris is reaching some milestones. Yesterday, she sat up on her own! However, I still can't leave her alone for very long, as her balance is not terrific. She also started on solid food, which has been an adventure in and of itself. Iris, with all of her independence and strong will, is not the most patient baby. When she's hungry, she's hungry NOW. And you can't get the food in her mouth fast enough. Of course, being on the independent side, she is also trying to feed herself. Her grabs at the spoon typically result in food all over her hands, and she doesn't seem to understand yet that sucking on the spoon doesn't release more food. Oh yes, and then there are the raspberries, which always seem to come when her mouth is full of food. Hmmm. . .I wonder if this is deliberate.
I'm not feeling particularly poetic at the moment, so I'm afraid this post will be rather short. But for all of you who are on Facebook, I now have a profile, so look me up! Sorry, Christina, but I couldn't do myspace. Facebook is more my speed.
In other news, we are planning a trip to the East Coast this summer. Chip and April, welcome back to the States. We're glad you're closer now, for more reasons than simply that we can come and visit you more easily. =)
Happy, um, snow day, everyone!

Homework, oh homework, I hate you, you stink!

2008-02-27T11:42:00.000-08:00

As you may have noticed, I've had very little time to post lately. This is because of the surprising amount of homework that two classes can create. During my days, I'm trying to scrape together every ounce of free time to clean the house or work on schoolwork. In fact, it has become so bad that I realized this last weekend how much I'm having to give up to continue on my current track. After much hemming and hawing, I decided to wait another two years to enter the Master's program, thus taking the time to enjoy Iris' early years. This decision has given me such a feeling of freedom, and I'm planning all sorts of fun things for next term: classes with Iris, Waterbabies in the summer, even training for a half-marathon in may, and a full marathon in October.
But more on all that later. I'm sure you are all missing pictures of Iris (and more than anyone, I know my parents, who are currently in New Zealand, are missing her!), so I thought I'd post some on what she does while I study. Notice her mouth in the second picture. This shark bite (her newest nickname is Sharky) is most typical when she's anywhere near what I'm eating. Otherwise, she spins around in her exersaucer putting her mouth on everything she can reach. The third picture is over attempt to devour the educational philosophies of E.D. Hirsch. At least she's enjoying my homework!

Family First

2008-02-07T11:33:00.000-08:00

Wow. Talk about your big decisions. I woke up this morning to the phone ringing. Thinking it was probably family (this happens frequently), I picked it up and mumbled a sleepy "hello?". Well, it wasn't anyone in my family, but instead it was a teacher from Mountain View, a school that I frequently sub at. She was calling to offer me a job. How many times does someone wake you up with an ideal job offer at a place you love to work, with people you love to work with, when you haven't even applied? However, there is a reason I haven't been looking for work, so I told them no. But then, as much as I wanted to, I couldn't sleep for thinking about it. After all, it was the job I have wanted, at a great school, with great people, and it just dropped out of the blue. So, I called back for the details. Part-time, temporary, taking over for someone I had subbed for before. It sounded ideal. But what was best for my family? After two hours of going back and forth and trying to come up with various ways that I could make it work, I realized that I was striving. I looked at my sleeping baby and realized that this is time I won't have with her again. I want to decide on a day to day basis whether I want to work, rather than being scheduled into it every day. I haven't had to make a decision this difficult for awhile--I can't tell you how badly I wanted the job. Even after Josh and I made the decision, I put off calling the school until just now, maybe somehow hoping things would change. But I guess that's part of being a mom--being willing to make sacrifices for your kids. It's not a long-term sacrifices, only a short-term. I will get my chance, just not next week. I know I made the right decision, but now I'm going to go cry a little. I want to be a kid again--it's awfully hard being an adult.

Snow days

2008-01-29T10:28:00.000-08:00

At long last, the snow that we have been promised arrived. Not that we haven't had any yet, but it didn't last for long. After waking up to white, the disappointment of green by the afternoon is strong. That's what it has been like all week. Last Thursday it began to snow in the afternoon, giving us nice drifts to walk around in and catch snowflakes. That lasted partway into Friday, when it melted off. Then again this week, we have woken up to snow every day--three in a row so far, and expecting it again tomorrow. But as I sit here writing, I'm watching the big drips fall from our roof and the trees, telling me that again it will not last. Oh well. I guess it's at least enough to feel like winter!
It feels like it's been forever since I last wrote anything. This is mostly because of our crazy schedule. Along with classes, I've had everything else that I've been trying to keep up with. On top of my workload, Josh has been working night and day--evenings, and all weekend--on a project at work that is extremely frustrating. On the upside, we found out yesterday that he is being rewarded with a bonus and a raise. Yay! But all this time trying to achieve our separate goals has been difficult. I'm looking forward to Spring Break!
Iris is constantly amazing us. I know they say that it doesn't matter in the long run how soon a baby reaches the milestones, but I can be proud of her advanced progress anyway! After all, we already know she's a genius (whoa, I almost spelled that wrong!) =). As Josh says, after a growth spurt, her motor skill seem to improve exponentially. Last Thursday she rolled from her back to her stomach! The average age for that is five months--I think we're in trouble! We also caught her playing with a spinny ball in her excersaucer. She often accidentally brushed it, but when I heard the balls rattling around repeatedly, I looked to find her looking directly at it and spinning it deliberately. It kept her entertained for about half and hour. Luckily we finally got tapes for our video camera, so we're having lots of fun recording all of her antics. When we figure out how to rewind without later taping over pieces, I'll try to post some video.
Well, trying to get some work done, so I'd better stop. But I just wanted to say to you, wherever you are (yes, even you, Grandma Miller, in southern California), happy snow days!!

A time of growth

2008-01-22T10:23:00.000-08:00

Well, I haven't been too good the past couple of weeks about updating the blog, but it's been a couple of weeks of complete craziness. Someone needs to remind me how much work I put into school (even when it's not necessary). Add to that a three-month-old (who has been going through a major growth spurt and giving me very little sleep), a house always in need of cleaning, a job that doesn't pay, and trying to get time for at least a few little jobs that do, combined with all my old obligations, and I'm exhausted.
However, even in the midst of this chaos, there have been some bright spots. We had snow a couple of days in the past three weeks, we took our first family vacation together, and Josh and I got to go out with the intention of going skiing yesterday. We headed up to Hoodoo to go x-country skiing (I used to go a lot as a kid, but it's a new found sport for Josh; we both love it), Mom and Dad had Iris for the day. However, after driving on a sheet of ice for a long time (I love my car, by the way), we got up the mountain only to find that it was just as windy there as it was in the valley. However, add snow to the mix and it can be miserable. So instead, we stopped at Potato Hill, slid down a couple of hills (next time, I think we should bring a sled!), and then came back through Eugene. Even though we didn't get the skiing we wanted, we did get a day spent together!
Last weekend was our first family vacation. Josh and I have both been craving a trip to the coast, so we stayed in a little vacation rental on Cannon Beach. I have to say, vacations are a much different thing with a baby! We even had to come back to the house for a long nap one afternoon. =) While Josh's and my mentality when it comes to vacations is go see do be, and explore as much as possible, we found that we have to adjust our expectations a little with Iris along. But it was fun, and we're learning how to travel with a family, and how to raise travel-friendly kids. So, on that note, Chip and April, we need to talk to you about D.C. this summer. =)
Well, off to try to get some more of my crazy workload done! Oh, I finally put together a flickr account, so if you want to see lots of pictures of Iris, please visit flickr. Now you can see those Christmas pictures I've been so negligent about! Also, I will try to put the link in the sidebar, so you can visit and see updates whenever you like!

School again?

2008-01-02T15:50:00.000-08:00

Yes, it's true. I'm going back to school on Monday. Funny, it's as though six years of trying to finish a four-year degree taught me nothing. After headaches from transferring credits, paying tons of money (though now I am appreciating California education prices), getting good grades, trying to convince the California education system that I really had taken a Writing Intensive class (hence, the name Writing Intensive on said class) and shouldn't have to take their writing assessment as this is rather lost on an English major, and all the other school-related issues, I am again setting foot in that rushing river we call college. Let's hope I don't drown.
I tried to get my student ID card for the third time today, and finally they were open. Hard as it is to go on campus with Iris, I've been rather bitter toward them. I tried to get my card during finals week, when they informed me that they were not issuing them until the 10th of December. Needless to day, I didn't have much of a chance to make it over there, but tried again on December 31st. But, just to make sure, I called to find out if they were indeed open. All I got was a busy signal, then an answering machine. However, there was nothing odd posted online, so I headed over. I walked into the administration building, and every department was open. Good sign, right? Well, every department except for the ID center. But, third time's a charm, and we got in today.
As I was getting my picture taken (today was, of course, the only one of the three days that I didn't have time to do my hair or makeup--this picture will haunt me for the next four years!), the lady working asked me how old my then-sleeping baby was. I replies, "two and a half months." She then said, "Wow! And you're going back to school? You're so. . .so. . .what's the word I'm looking for?" "Crazy?" I supplied. She then assured me that the word she was looking for was more along the lines of ambitious. I still think crazy is correct.
We then went down to the bookstore and purchased a notebook and textbook, and so now I feel rather studious. And crazy. Talking with some friends the other night, I realized just how much work this is going to be--two years of classes to get into the program, two years to a master's degree. And then, that's not all of it. If I want to go on to get my doctorate later as I am planning to, I have to get a separate master's degree (mine will be in Teaching, a special category, rather than Education, which I plan to get my doctorate in). It's really a good thing that I like school!
Here is a little bonus, if I did it right (I'm rather technologically challenged). This is a video clip of Iris dancing in the mirror. If you turn the sound up, you can hear her little squeaks, and when she gets really wiggly at the end, that's all her. Sorry for the graininess--we took it with my little camera's video setting.

The First Christmas

2007-12-28T10:34:00.001-08:00

If this Christmas is any sort of sign of things to come, we need a much bigger house. Our presents (Josh's and mine) were reasonable--a couple CD's, DVD's, books (of course), and the fabulous orange Le Creuset pot to start off our collection (thanks, Mom!). As we have moved into a much smaller house than we previously owned, and are trying to get back into a simpler lifestyle that we enjoy much more, I really didn't want much for Christmas. However, all the stops were pulled when it came to Iris' gifts (I should have guessed). All in all, she has five new pairs of shoes (three from Mommy alone--you can tell what my fetish is!) several outfits, half a shelf of new books (yay!), and a boxload of new toys. I guess we don't have a choice on whether to get a toybox or not! They are now sitting in cardboard box in her room until we make a run to Ikea!
Christmas was fun and everyone loved to ooh and ahh over the baby. For our present, she gave us two nights in a row of eight hours of solid sleep! (She reached nine+ hours last night, but that was probably recovering from vaccinations!) Merry Christmas! However, Iris managed to sleep through all of the present opening, both on Christmas Eve with Josh's family, and on Christmas Day with mine. Next year I am anticipating even more fun with her. I can't wait to take her to pumpkin patches on Halloween, and watch her open Christmas presents and play with the boxes and wrapping paper instead of the gifts! (Unfortunately, we were so busy that we didn't get many Christmas pics, so I'm waiting for other people to send them to me so that I can post them later.)
Though Christmas is my favorite holiday, I am glad for it to be over. Having every weekend filled up with activities with family and friends can get a bit tiring. Now with months of no plans except our first vacation with Iris in January (Canon Beach-yay!), classes starting for me, and the Emerald Bowl tonight (go Beavs!), I can finally relax. Maybe even get some work done! New Year, new start. Here's to a great year with my new family!
P.S. I wrote this blog yesterday, but didn't post because I was waiting for pictures. Beavs won the Emerald Bowl last night (thanks to Iris, our lucky charm in her Beaver shirt), and Iris performed her first stomach to back roll this morning!!! Hooray for our strong girl! She's even about three-quarters of the way to rolling from her back to her stomach--we were watching her at Grandma's house the other day and thought she was actually going to do it! How am I going to keep up with her? =)

Stop with the movies, already!

2007-12-20T10:59:00.001-08:00

I had to write right now, just to vent my feelings of frustration with Hollywood. I am so sick of them making movies based on literature! They never (well, almost never) get it right, and they never do the books justice. I recently found out that a movie of Atonement by Ian McEwan. A small thing, you may think? Then you don't understand how deep my love of literature goes. This is one of my all-time favorite books--one that moved me to weeping (not just tears), one of the most powerful books I've read in years. And now it's a movie. But that's not all. To add to the blasphemy, I just found out that Keira Knightley, one of my all-time most hated actresses, is playing one of the major roles. AAUUUGGGHHH! Wasn't it enough for you to ruin Pride and Prejudice? Why must you cut an even broader swath of destruction? Anyway, sorry. Had to get that out.
I had to include a picture of Iris to justify my rant here (that's why everyone visits my blog anyway!). Of course, she will grow up to one day love great literature and detest Hollywood's simplistic retellings. It is my duty to train her the right way. =)

The Eight-Week Appointment

2007-12-17T17:08:00.000-08:00

Here is my little growly bear as we got ready for caroling with our small group. Could you ask for a cuter baby? Our little family has been so busy with Christmas events--city tree-lightings, caroling, Christmas dinners with friends, more than enough to keep us on our toes. I commented to Josh the other day (when I realized Christmas was 9 days away) that you know you are an adult when Christmas' impending arrival no longer excites, but rather stresses you out!
Today Iris went in for her two-month appointment--and that means vaccines. While we're not letting them bombard her with four shots at once (quite a lot for her little system to handle all at once), she did get two. It was much harder than I expected. As I held her and tried to comfort her, she looked up at me as if to say, "Mommy, why are you letting them do this to me?" It was completely heartbreaking, and I couldn't keep from crying myself.
Other than icky vaccinations, though, things are going well. I'm just a little nervous about going back to school in January. If I can't get everything done now, how much harder when I have term papers and tests? I don't know how people who work full time do it!

Getting back to work (sort of)

2007-12-12T16:28:00.000-08:00

Ever since my six-week appointment, I have been trying to get back into the swing of work. Ha, ha, ha. On the two days since then that Iris has been on her regular schedule I got quite a good amount done online, but only wrote one new entry and finished maybe two chapters in my current book. Hmm. . .nice try. However, to help me get back into the swing of things, I ran across a free book contest on an author site I frequent for Jo Knowles. She then had links to other young adult author sites also having contests: Lisa Schroeder and Tiffany Trent. Maybe I'll get lucky! It seems like the start I need. However, I have been working on my writing at random times--it seems that lately things have just been coming to me out of nowhere. Maybe my creativity is finally waking up from the stagnation of California (apologies to all who are in CA. It's not that it is bad, but for some reason, I couldn't write there. For me I think it was more as Anne would say, that there was little scope for the imagination. Back on my home turf I seem to do much better). So, anyway, there was a deal with Jo Knowles' contest in which you would get another entry if you posted a ten-line poem. For those of you who know my writing, I'm not much of one for poetry. There is very little I even enjoy reading. But somehow, this just flowed out of me:

Giving up my time,
My lifestyle, my sanity;
I wondered: How can I do this?
Do I even have it in me?
How do I love and forgive
And have that much patience?
To give my life for cries and routines,
To exchange my clean house for a dirty one,
My restful nights for sleepless ones—
How will I cope?
But one look, the first touch;
The sweet smiles only for me—
The look that says: You are mine
And I am yours.
These have made it all worthwhile
And taught me that the greatest thing in life
Is to be a mom.

I know it's not great poetry, but it's a start. Josh is excited to have me writing again, so it was his wish for me to put it on the blog.
Josh and I had another date this past weekend, and we attended a house concert for David Nevue, a local pianist I love (though he was easier to see in California than he is in his hometown!). It never quite feels like Christmas until I've been to a piano concert, and the intimate atmosphere (there were only seats for 40 people) made this one exceptional! So now, let the season begin! If only I had time to decorate the tree sitting in my living room. . .

2007-11-29T11:53:00.000-08:00

I have to say, I didn't think that it would be quite this difficult to find time to blog! This entry alone took me two days. Thanksgiving was last week, and it's taken me this long to write about it! Anyway, the holiday went very well. This year we told everyone that we were having Thanksgiving at our house, and if anyone wanted to come, they could feel free. Of course, with the draw of a new baby, everyone wanted to come. So we fit twelve family members into our little house, and, even more amazing, around our table (we added a rubbermaid table to the end, but even so, I was amazed!). I had farmed out most of the food, leaving very little for me to do. Plus, with everyone else holding Iris, I lost the usual role that I've become accustomed to. Yay for being just me sometimes! However, much as I enjoy being a separate being from my baby, I was aching to hold her at the end of the night. So after everyone left, we cuddled and watched ghost hunter shows together (so much for the Christmas movie tradition!)
I really haven't had it that bad. I've determined that I'm going to be an out-and-about stay-at-home-mom. I rarely go two days without getting out of the house, and I've even had some girl time mixed in there--going out to Olive Garden with friends from high school, shopping with Mom on the day after Thanksgiving, and Josh and I even went out for a really nice dinner date together on Iris' one-month birthday! Having our freedom for five years really encourages us to cultivate our own relationship, as well as incorporating Iris into the life we've enjoyed. Plus, on top of all that, I start class again in January, and have been getting calls for jobs already. While I love staying home with Iris and would never choose to work full-time during her first year, these little things have been helping me to maintain my own life.
Iris has been going through a growth spurt this week (which basically means that our routine that was working so well flies out the window, and I am stuck in one place nursing her for what seem insanely long periods of time). However, this new phase of growth has brought with it some fun new developments. For one thing, her movements are beginning to become more coordinated. And, the most exciting for me, she's smiling at me. Though she began to smile at Daddy and Uncle Andy last night, she's been smiling at me and me alone for the past week. Now, these aren't those gassy smiles, these are the real deal. A big full-on, wide-mouthed grin. If only I could get her to do it for the camera! Everyone tells me that her first word will probably be "daddy", but hey, Mommy gets the first smiles!

Thank goodness for slings!

2007-11-15T17:24:00.000-08:00

I have to say, if you have a baby and don't have a sling, you are really missing out! This wonderful scrap of fabric has the magical capabilities of making your child feel as though they are back in the womb. We had a couple of seriously grumpy days this week, but the sling is the savior of my sanity. For instance, Mommy had the bright idea this week of making sure that Iris is flexible with a schedule, and can live the happy-go-lucky life that Mommy wants to live, i.e. going out whenever we feel like it, rather than figuring out a schedule based on feeding times. This, obviously, resulted in an unhappy baby who got perhaps two hours of sleep during the day. Hmmm, smart, Mommy. The only thing that would calm her in the evening is being worn around in the sling. So the next day, Mommy was a bit smarter and scheduled her errands for just after feedings. Other than the fact that being strapped down in a carseat makes Iris very unhappy until the car starts moving and Diana Krall is playing (I wonder why feeling completely immobile and attached to a bulky seat would do that!), this was a good plan. However, by the time we reached the post office, Iris was still awake. Thus, I adopted the sling, which makes her go (usually) almost instantly to sleep. However, this meant that putting her back in the carseat after finishing in the post office would wake her up and make her mad, so we had a lovely jaunt around Downtown Corvallis, ignoring the "30 minute parking" signs, and visiting Daddy at work. All of which Iris slept through.
Now I am making dinner and cleaning, wearing a baby who doesn't want to go to bed, but who is perfectly happy in the sling! The picture is a mommy's-eye-view of the sleeping beauty. Thank goodness for slings.
Oh, and I forgot to say that Iris has had her first artistic experience last week. We went with Poppy (my dad) to a lecture by Bernard Malamud's daughter. For those of you who don't know one of Corvallis' most praised notables, Malamud wrote The Natural among many other novels, and was a professor at OSU for several years. Iris was quite good and listened intently, and I'm sure, is blossoming into a genius right before our eyes!

Happy (late) Halloween!

2007-11-08T09:03:00.001-08:00

So I'm a bit slow on the uptake here, but it's pretty crazy with a new baby! Josh went back to work last Thursday, so I've had my hands full, quite literally. However, late as it is, I had to show off the picture of the cutest baby in the world. This was taken at two weeks (I can't believe she is three weeks old already. She's growing up too fast!), and her shirt (which, like all of her clothes, is too big for her) says "Mummy loves me". We got to spend the evening with Aunt Rachael and Uncle Andy, making cupcakes and cookies, and basically overdosing on the sugar. This time of year makes me miss our friends Chip and April, though. I miss Chip's excitement as he opened our door and handed out candy to trick-or-treaters. I'm just finding that I'm not friendly enough!
I keep saying it, but it's shocking how different life is for me now. I'm not someone who sits still well, and, up until I got into the nesting stage of pregnancy, I don't think I had ever had a day where I had stayed inside for the entire day unless I was sick. Now, however, I have been getting out about once every other day. It helps being in a house--for some reason there is so much more to do than in an apartment. But the hassle of getting out is still a little overwhelming. I know it will get better and feel more doable, but for now, getting out to see Daddy and take a walk in the park is quite an event. I've also noticed a change in what we listen to and watch. Not that we watched anything terrible before, but swear words certainly stand out in movies a lot more than they used to. And my Diana Krall and Reliant K standby CD's in my car (the two that seem to cover every mood) have been replaced by Raffi. They aren't bad changes (personally, I love Raffi, and drive Josh nuts singing Baby Beluga), it's just different. Even now I'm realizing that I have to wrap this up, as Iris' nap has bought me free time to get a couple of things done! My time is no longer my own!

The Newest Beaver Believer

2007-10-30T14:05:00.000-07:00

I know, I'm a bit die-hard. But Saturday was Iris' first game day, so she had to be decked out in Beaver gear, even though it didn't fit her at all. In fact, she almost looked like a football player herself, with the shoulders of her outfit sticking so far out! But she brought luck to our team, and we, miraculously, beat Stanford.
So as she lies here on my lap while I take a few moments to write, I watch her sleeping face and almost forget about the difficult times this past week. Not completely forget, though. We were convinced when she came home from the hospital that we had an angel baby. She was sleeping through the night (we had to wake her up to feed her, and actually still do), only crying when she was hungry, and generally very happy. And then the second week came along. It's not that she had suddenly become something awful, but she has become more assertive. We're already training up a strong woman here. She has times some nights that she cries for two hours and we can't figure out what she wants. We've pretty much ruled out colic (it's certainly not extreme enough), but knowing that she's okay and not screaming in pain doesn't make her mommy feel much better. What do you do when you love someone so much and would do anything for them, but you can't figure out what it is that she wants?
Iris does, however, love her Nonny and Poppy (my mom and dad), and is somehow always on her best behavior when they come over. This fact made it possible for Josh and I to get out for the first time last night with some friends. It was such a relief to have a break for a couple of hours, to just be us again. Of course, I was asking Josh every five minutes if his cell phone was on, and I was shocked when I realized how much I missed her. It's amazing how much you can love such a small person! Even when she is screaming at 2 a.m., and all I want is sleep, my heart breaks for her. It certainly gives a different perspective to understanding God's love for us. As much as I wish I could, I don't think I could ever love other people enough to sacrifice my own daughter. Not to get mopey or solemn or anything, but my perspectives on life have changed drastically in the last two weeks.
Well, it is a beautiful day here in Corvallis, and we might take the opportunity for a jaunt in McDonald Forest. I'm trying to make the most of the two weeks that Josh is home from work--a rare treat! We're off to introduce Iris to the beauty of Oregon!

Iris!

2007-10-26T16:35:00.001-07:00

It's amazing how quickly your life can change! I'm using what little down time I have to publish pictures of our beautiful baby girl, when I really should be using the time for other things. =) But this is much more fun. Iris Kate was born on October 17, and weighed 7 lbs, 6 oz. After a five and a half hour labor (yes, I know, I'm very lucky), she was born at 10:40 p.m. I was able to have her without an epidural (which was my goal), and am very glad that I chose to do so. Though it was a very intense time (with such a short labor, it's all hard labor, with no breaks), I would do it again in a heartbeat. I couldn't believe it when they set this beautiful little girl on my chest--at first I couldn't figure out whose she was! I'm not sure how we could be so blessed, but I'm so thankful for my little girl. When I have a bit more time, I will try to post more pictures, and maybe write a little more clearly instead of rambling. =)

Waiting. . .

2007-10-03T12:08:00.001-07:00

Aaahh! Fall here is so wonderful! I'm sure you're sick of hearing that from me, but after so long of having the seasons go directly from summer to winter, this is so refreshing! Watching football on the weekends (though not so enjoyable this last weekend! We played the most pathetic game!), seeing the leaves turn colors, sitting in a coffee shop sipping warm drinks while the rain falls, yes, it's good to be back in Oregon.
So enough of my droning on. This is my 9 month(!) picture, taken in our church's outdoor amphitheater. Yay for moving inside next week! Plus, Pastor Chuck Smith is flying up to open our new building! But, anyway, we've passed the nine month mark, and getting a bit antsy. All of those projects that I procrastinated on all summer are getting finished in one week (who says it's hard to work under pressure?), and I finally packed my hospital bag. We just have to do our best not to have her over the weekend, as my parents are in Tennessee. But after that, break out the Raspberry Leaf!
We passed by a sign today advertising the annual "Great Pumpkin Run". Normally, it would sound like fun, but right now. . .well, obviously not. So I was being funny and I said to Josh, "Hey, I think I should do that!" My wonderful, sensitive, supporting hubby responds with, "yeah, you could be the pumpkin!". Thanks Honey.
I'm afraid that this is turning into a bit of a ramble rather than actually talking about news, but oh well. My new website is up and running, for those of you who check it, and we're trying to spread the word. Also, I'm working on photo albums of flickr, so that when the baby arrives, everyone can see lots of pictures, not just the ones I happen to post. Not a whole lot of "new" going on, just in that hurry up and wait stage.

Daddy's Present and My Website--coming soon!

2007-09-19T12:16:00.000-07:00

Well, I may have mentioned it before, but having a girl brings out the soft side of Josh. He decided a couple of weeks ago that the crib we had inherited wasn't good enough for his little girl. Because of this we went on a spontaneous crib search, deciding to order one online. However, after a week of waiting, Babies R Us canceled our order, and we were back to square one. Then Josh found this beauty on Craigslist (our best friend) in Eugene. So we drove down to take a look. It was used by an obviously affluent family, very well taken care of, and right in our price range (new, this crib far exceeds anything we could afford). So, we loaded it up in our Fit (I love my car!), and now Daddy has is present for Iris.
It's odd, I've been noticing today that I am much less interested in taking jobs than I used to be. I am extremely picky about times, schools, and giving up my work days. For someone who always wanted to get out of the house as much as possible, this is a strange thing for me. I have a month left, and wouldn't mind staying home and working here for most of it. Is this normal? I'm hoping that it's the nesting phase, and that I'll be back to my go-see-do-be self a couple of months after the baby is born. After all, I'm planning to start classes again in January!
For those of you who check my website, the new one should be up sometime this week! As soon as Josh looks over some of my reviews, we're going live! It still isn't completely finished, and probably never will be =), but it looks great! In the future, I'm hoping to have a "favorite picture books" section (thanks to a friend's suggestion), but it isn't up quite yet. However, I have added LOTS of reviews, and, as I am now working on it full time, I average a new review every week day. So if you could spread the word, knowing people are looking definitely keeps me on my toes! I have a surprising amount of people watching right now, but we could always use more!

Good things about Pregnancy

2007-09-12T11:09:00.000-07:00

As I am enjoying this lovely, overcast fall day (I went to my favorite coffee shop for an apple cider), I began to think that I feel like I complain a lot about pregnancy. So I've decided to list a few things that I love about it (We'll see if I make it to ten!).
1. After you get far enough along (it took me about 8 months!) people begin to notice that you are pregnant, and not just gaining weight in one location, and they begin to share your excitement (plus, I haven't dealt with strangers touching my belly yet!).
2. Presents! Even though they aren't technically for me, I'll enjoy them more than the baby will!
3. Special treatment. Though Josh says I haven't milked this one yet, I find that a lot of our friends offer it to me anyway. Things like letting me take the front seat in the car, retrieving things for me, giving me the first place in the food line, etc.
4. Probably one of the best parts is watching your husband pick out things for the baby--especially if you're having a girl. Josh decided over the weekend that the hand-me-down crib we had wasn't good enough for his little girl, so now we are buying "the" crib. Any time he gets stuck on something we see at a store or anything, I have to let him get it! I'm not discouraging him!
5. Feeling like I have an excuse to rest when I'm not feeling well. For some reason, I never feel justified normally to take it easy, but now, when I feel bad, the rest is for her as well as me.
6. The anticipation. The reality won't completely set in until we bring Iris home, so for now I have rosy thoughts about dressing her and taking her out, without the bad parts that I know will come with the good.
7. Organizing! Being the neat freak that I am, organizing her clothes and putting together her room is so much fun for me! And I love that we can take the time to really do her room up, and create a dream nursery for her.
8. Clothes shopping--for me. Though after about six months this lost its appeal (there is no way to make a pregnant belly look terribly flattering in those dressing-room mirrors), it was so much fun at first to plan and buy a whole new wardrobe in anticipation of my growing belly.
9. Books, of course! Now I have a reason to stock up on all those kids books I've always loved!
10. Imagining playing with my little one, and visualizing her around the house, playing with the dog, and bringing sunshine into our hearts. =) (Sorry, a bit sappy there, but hey, I'm hopped up on estrogen. It's allowed.)

School Days, School Days

2007-09-04T10:55:00.000-07:00

There's something in the air today that makes it feel like fall is here. Or, rather, something on the road--school buses! School started today here in Oregon, and everything feels right. For those of you like me whose lives seem to revolve around the school year (even though it no longer affects many of us directly), it's the time of year for memories. Crunching through leaves on crisp autumn days, running cross-country practices through fields of waist-high grass, sitting inside and sipping a cup of hot apple cider while curled up reading. Somehow, though, I never seem to remember the stress and chaos of school. Funny how that works! =)
Labor Day weekend was fun as well. It's always that last kickoff before school starts, usually hot with the anticipation hanging thickly in the air. Often we go to the state fair, but this year (for some strange reason that I can't figure out!) I didn't feel like walking in the hot sun for eight hours. Hmm, wonder why that is! Having a three-day weekend after a summer void of them was a refreshing break, however. Someone needs to schedule more holidays in summer! A three month stretch with only the Fourth of July seems a bit overkill.
The images above are of Iris' room. We're going for a classic Peter Pan look (sorry, Disney fans, the closer I get to being a mom, the more I dislike Disney), and luckily we know the right people. My college roommate (a graphic designer) came and painted the clouds from stillshots of the clouds in the new live-action Peter Pan (which, if you haven't seen it, is incredible). I thought she did a fabulous job! We have a little more work to do--mermaid lagoon (the closet) is being painted right now, and we still have a chair rail and baseboards to put up, but the end is in sight. Wonderful, as this has been quite the project! It began with retexturing the ceiling (just to give you an idea of what Josh has been doing) because we had popcorn up, but now it's looking wonderful. What a lucky baby!

Baby shower!

2007-08-30T14:37:00.000-07:00

How wonderful my family and friends are! The shower last weekend was so much fun! I included my 32 week picture (I can't believe we're that far along already!) in a game we played where the shower guests estimated how large around they thought my belly was now, and I have to say, I was much smaller than most of them thought. =) One of my cousins, Mandi, guessed it exactly! After games we had some food and ate delicious cake made by Rachael's sister-in-law. Then presents. It's amazing how blessed you can feel by opening presents--just remembering that each one represents someone who loves and thinks about you! Anyway, we received a lot of incredible things. Iris is going to be one spoiled little girl!
I don't want to bore everyone with details of the shower, so I won't go on and on about it. But it was a lot of fun, and very special to me that Rachael put everything together so well! Right now I am enjoying a little more time off before school starts back up. Kids go back next week, and I have a feeling that the sub jobs will be a little slow. Oh, well, though. that gives me time to get a few more "summer" things done before launching into fall. If you are watching my website at all, it is going through some pretty major changes at the moment, and Josh expects to have something new and really cool up in about three more weeks. So I'd better get my act together and write more reviews. My goal is to have 50 up by the time the new website is active, and I think I'm going to make it! So be watching for that!
And, speaking of work, I'd better get some done today!

2007-08-23T15:49:00.000-07:00

I just had to take a few minutes to gush a bit about how happy I am to be back in Oregon. Where else can you walk into a local hardware store (which is doing a great job competing with the new Home Depot) and buy pears fresh off someone's tree? This summer I've gotten a sampling of wonderful local produce, and there's nothing better! Last week I learned how to can peaches, and they are sitting there staring at me tempting me to eat them now instead of waiting until winter. We got to pick organically grown blueberries, and I can't wait to see if I can't find a u-pick corn farm. It's wonderful!
I'm also happy to be around people I know and love! I'm able to get my hair done at a salon owned by a high school friend (as you can see in my 31 week picture, I've gone red again!). It's a 40 minute drive still, but it's worth it! And my wonderful sister-in-law is planning an amazing baby shower for me this weekend! I can't believe how excited I am. I will be sure to post pictures up next week! Being close to family is so nice--just being able to call them up if we want to visit the new Ikea or go have lunch is such a blessing. We're even trying to plan a weekend trip around Christmas with my parents--something we were unable to do from California.
So, anyway, lots of sappy gushy stuff. Life is treating me well right now, though we're really busy. Some of you may have heard about my hospital overnighter a couple of weeks ago, but everything seems to be fine right now. Iris isn't giving us any indication that she's going to be born early (which is a good thing, as her room is far from ready!), and the doctor took me off my rest. I still have to take it a bit easier than I was, but now I don't worry about working around the house or going out shopping like before. Though I am becoming a bit disenchanted with this whole pregnancy thing. I feel ungainly, food doesn't usually sound good, and I wake up stiff every morning. I can't wait until I'm normal again! And then I'll be able to see Iris, instead of just looking at my big belly!

2007-08-06T15:15:00.000-07:00

It's interesting that the bigger I get, the more I desire to do more traditionally feminine things. Not that I don't normally consider myself feminine, but some of the aspects that are often expected of women (i.e. wearing makeup), don't generally interest me. In many ways, they feel like a waste of time. However, at 29 weeks, I'm feeling so large and ungainly that I find myself spending time in ways that aren't that typical of me. Perhaps my lack of interest goes down to the earthy crunchy side of me, but lately it's become more important to me to do my makeup in the morning (those of you who know me know this isn't typically a very important ritual in my life), paint my toenails, wear dresses, etc. It's interesting to say the least, but I chalk most of it up to wanting to feel graceful and womanly, even though I have this enormous belly protruding out front. Reassurances from friends and family only go so far, as my personal feelings contradict what they say about me. Even my mom went on and on about how I was the smallest person there in my birthing class, but I think at this stage, feeling and being are two very different things. Luckily, I have people in my life who help me to feel pretty even though my psyche isn't so sure. Josh is very encouraging always and talks about how I keep myself in shape, my mother-in-law offers to paint my toenails, as it is becoming hard to reach, and my college roommate creates art on my belly. From my experiences, I feel so badly for those women who have to go through this whole process alone. It's not only about having a baby and having your life change in that way, but even your own body becomes unfamiliar and foreign to you, which I have found to be more difficult than I imagined. Don't get me wrong, I'm very happy to be pregnant--it fascinates me and I could watch Iris moving around in my tummy for hours--but it has its own blends of hardships that I wasn't quite expecting.
Some great (hopefully) news--I have an appointment this week to talk to an advisor about possibly starting in on my credentials. I've enjoyed the subbing that I've done and am looking forward to more of it when school starts, but have gained confidence and the desire to move toward having my own classroom. I thought that getting my Masters Degree was out of the question for a few years, but my mom pointed out the possibility of stretching out the program and doing one or two classes at a time. As you may know, I'm quite a nerd, and the idea of studying and going back to school, without the stress of juggling five classes at once, excites me. So I'm talking to the two local universities to see what the possibility of taking a long-term track toward my next degree would be. I think the intellectual stimulation of taking classes again will help me through some of the baby years as well. I want to be there, but at the same time, I need adult time as well in order to be a healthy mom. One or two classes a term would be a wonderful mix, as I wouldn't have to spend much time away from Iris, and I'd still be on track, studying something that greatly interests me. So, if you read this, be praying that something along these lines works out for me--I've been presented the possibility and am trusting God to work all things out!

Ahh, summer!

2007-08-01T14:32:00.000-07:00

It never fails that I set out to achieve many things over a summer break, only to get to the end and realize that I have accomplished few or none of my goals. This year is only an exception in that I am realizing this fact a month earlier than usual. The books I have to read, the work I wanted to get done, the yard I wanted to plan, and the baby to get ready for, all have fallen by the wayside. Thus I have determined not to let this month pass with nothing to show for myself.
It seems that letting summer slip by is a bit easier to do here in Corvallis. With the beautiful weather (thought it seems hotter this year, as I am an oven myself), the concerts in the park, the innumerable outdoor activities planned with our small group, work and seriousness seem to fall by the wayside. Yesterday I planned to be good and work all afternoon, though I got a call from Josh's mom inviting me over to the pool. Guess which option I chose.
Gary and Christina came down for Da Vinci Days a couple of weeks ago--an annual festival here in Corvallis that it has killed me to miss the past four years. It's the time that Corvallis really celebrates its artistic side, a focus on science and technology blended with the arts. The picture of Josh above was while he was riding a bicycle-type machine that walked instead of driving wheels. The exhibit was machines that were the antithesis of efficiency, and quite entertaining. There was a chair that scooted itself back if you tried to sit in it, as well as several others. All in all, it was a lot of fun, and a great chance to show friends the wonderful area where we live.
Well, it's off to work! Keep checking my book site, as it should be changing into a really cool layout sometime soon!

So long in between!

2007-07-06T15:07:00.001-07:00

I am really not as good as I like to believe myself to be at this whole blogging thing. Once again it's been a month since I last wrote, and an enormous spider in the garage prompted me to come inside rather than working on our garage sale (which, luckily, is about ready). I should have taken pictures of this spider, but it has to be the second largest spider I've ever seen. The first is the Hobo, which you have probably heard my stories of--as large as my spread hand. This was an ugly black sucker, easily two inches long, crawling around on the inside of our water heater cover. After standing still in shock and watching it, my mind went through the processes of what to do with it. I thought about taking a picture since I thought no one would believe me, but my first priority was to kill it. However, I didn't see how I could physically do so with just a fly swatter, even if I could get close enough to hit it. Josh is gone for the weekend, so I went to one neighbor, and then to another who kindly came over to help me out. However, after fifteen minutes of rearranging the garage (hard to do, as it is full of furniture right now), stripping off the water heater cover, and removing any place that seemed easily accessible, we still had seen no sign of the monster. Thus, I am inside, rather than out finishing up with the garage sale things. (I haven't told Josh the whole story yet--I don't want to worry him too much).
It seems like forever since I wrote last. I've been really bad about belly pictures, so I posted the two above pictures. The second one is at twenty one weeks, and the first at 22 (blogger seems to reverse the order). I'm now at 25 weeks, and people are beginning to notice, though most tell me I'm pretty small for 6 months. Funny, I don't feel that way!
We were able to take a real vacation a couple of weeks ago! We were gone for 9 days--the longest vacation we have ever taken together! We went up to Seattle, spent a few days in Victoria where we saw the Buchart Gardens, had tea at the Empress (a dream come true), watched a black bear walk across the road right in front of us(!), and just explored. Then we moved on to Vancouver and had a blast at Granville Island, watched one of the best Shakespeare plays I've ever seen (The Taming of the Shrew done as a western--this link will take you to clips of the performance), and saw the belugas at the aquarium (Josh is sick of me singing the Baby Beluga song!). All in all, we had a wonderful time. Pretty soon here, I'm going to put a flickr photo album together so that you can view all of our pictures. Watch for it! And here's hoping that my next entry won't wait for next month!

It's a Girl!

2007-06-04T09:45:00.001-07:00

Well, as you may or may not know, we went in for our 20 week ultrasound on Friday. Normally, I would have posted a blog immediately, but, as we were in the middle of moving (busy day!), I haven't had a chance until now. So, here she is! The first picture is of her face (beautiful already!), and the second is a profile shot. I have to say, this came as a bit of a surprise for us! We really thought that we were having a boy! But it is a wonderfully sweet surprise--girls are so much more fun to prepare for! All the sweet dresses and girly things! Anyway, we're still thinking about names, and have some that we really like, but since everyone knows she's a girl now, maybe we should at least keep the name secret! =)
We moved into our house this weekend, and absolutely love it! It's in a wonderful, quiet neighborhood, with an enormous back yard! We're still in lots of boxes, and our young married's group is meeting here tonight, but we're having fun with it. So many plans, and this time, we're hoping to stay for a long time. There's plenty of room for expansion, so we hope to keep this house for several years.
So life is great for us right now, and we both feel like the world is our oyster! God has really blessed our little family (with a little girl coming soon!!!!!!)!

2007-05-18T15:16:00.001-07:00

Well, that turned out a little strange! I wanted to share pictures from the Japanese Garden, and they aligned themselves in quite an odd way. Oh, well. I don't have a whole lot to say today, and have plenty of work to do, but I wanted to post these pictures. This garden is up in Portland, and is probably one of my favorite places around here. The second picture is my 17 week picture, taken in front of one of the two sand gardens. The third is of Josh and I (yep, that's us in the middle) on one of the bridges. Anyway, I'm sure I'll have more to write (and more time) next week, but this one's been busy and I have to go!

New weather, new car, new house!

2007-05-07T16:18:00.000-07:00

Wow! We retrieved the summer clothes out of storage at just the right time! Not only is it sunny and warm today (and, man, it feels so much hotter when you're pregnant!), but it's going to stay this way, with only a 10% chance of precipitation (which in Oregon is actually still quite high)! So I'm sitting here, enjoying my after-school buzz (I think I had the best job ever today, and will be back tomorrow as well) in my sunny skirt and tank top, eating my Ben and Jerry's frozen yogurt, and just enjoying a wonderful day! But I wanted to take my few minutes of sanity and solitude--well, make a few minutes, rather--to let you know what God is doing in our lives.
As you can see, I got my car in last week. It arrived on Friday, and we decided to take my belly picture (16 weeks!) with it this week. =) I have to say, I am so happy with this car. I feel fun and sporty, and it gets great gas mileage (though it will be even better when the new car feel wears off and we stop driving it like a sports car!). Needless to say, we were gone the entire weekend making up for all that time that we couldn't leave town.
The other big piece of news is that we are buying a house. This was a bit of a surprise to us, as we were starting to lose hope that we would find anything we really wanted in our price range. We had a "fallback" duplex that we had first dibs on when it went on the market, but we weren't that thrilled about that option. Everything we could afford was two-bedroom, only a little tiny bit of land, and most often a duplex. But then, a week ago Sunday, we saw a house that looked promising on Craig's List, and it was in our ideal price range. We kept thinking, "What's the catch?", but decided to take a look. We were actually the first people to look at the house (which never happens in Corvallis), though the owner was getting constant phone calls about it. We noticed that the owner said that she and her family were "blessed" by this house, which made us think that maybe she was a Christian (a Christian-owned house in Corvallis is a real blessing, as the town has perhaps more than it's share of darkness in many respects). We continued to look through the house and really liked what we saw. Then, as we were finishing up, she mentioned that the fridge came with the house. I looked, and saw a wedding picture from one of Josh's friends from high school and his new wife. I said, "So, you know Tim and Sabrina." Her response was, "I'm Sabrina's sister." As it turns out, not only do we have all sorts of friends in common (through Tim and Josh), but she teaches at Josh's little brother's school, goes to the same church as our apartment manager, and is definitely a strong Christian. It was pretty amazing the way everything worked out. So we told Aimee that we would go home and pray about it, and let her know soon what we wanted to do, and she said she would do the same. I have never had such a peace about such a big decision. I felt calm and peaceful, and we prayed on the way home. Then we turned right around and came back to make an offer, which they accepted.
Those of you who know our stories probably know that big things happen every single move that we make. This was just another wonderful example of God's providence, and we are so excited to see what He has in store. So let me tell you about the house. It's small (which we expected)--just under 1000 square feet. It has a one-car garage (so we can finally get our kayak out of my parents'), but it's built on a quarter acre lot, so the back yard is unbelievably huge, especially for the town and the price. We have so many plans for the yard! It is a three-bedroom one-bath, with lots of room for expansion. Plus, it even had air-conditioning (very rare in Oregon), which I wasn't looking for at all, but thought would be wonderful during this nice, hot pregnant summer! God really had the exact house in place for us, and we are so grateful that we waited on His timing! I will make sure to post pictures as soon as I can! God is so good!

Work! (finally)

2007-04-24T13:56:00.000-07:00

I finally had my first day of work today! (For those of you who don't know--or if I didn't mention it earlier on my blog, I'm a substitute Educational Assistant, though I haven't had any jobs before today.) It was really quite exciting--I literally had to hit the ground running. The time that I was told that the job started was the time I would be meeting with my first kid--so I was very glad I showed up early. Though a bit intimidating at first, I felt like the day went well, and that the staff liked me. At times it really seemed as though I was in my element, though still a bit nervous and uncertain about the way things usually work. Yay for doing jobs in the field I want to work in! I have a surprising number lined up already for the future, too. Hooray!
So, I was meaning to post weekly pictures of my belly, and have completely forgotten about it most weeks. So this is a picture of me at week 14. Though I feel giant, when I look at the picture, I don't feel like I'm doing too badly. I just don't like the whole weight gain part of pregnancy! When we went in for an appointment last week, we were able to hear the baby's heartbeat. Talk about exciting! There's a part of me that always worries that something's wrong (since I can't feel anything yet), so the confirmation of the heartbeat really set me at ease. It was interesting to see the way both Josh and I think as well--for example, he heard a train (the heartbeat), while I heard a washing machine! Interesting, huh? Considering that Josh loves trains, and I associate sounds of washing machines with comforting feelings (a childhood thing), the sounds we each heard made sense. We also have scheduled the ultrasound for June 1st, and, yes, we are going to find out if it is a boy or a girl!
Still don't have my car yet! Waiting, always waiting. Hopefully I will hear something this week and put pictures up!

Pregnancy in Corvallis

2007-04-05T13:55:00.000-07:00

Thanks to a comment by Charlotte the other day (thank you very much! I love hearing from people back in California!), I was thinking about all the things available to pregnant women now, and what it's like to be pregnant in Corvallis (which is, surprisingly, very different from other areas). I have been fortunate enough to find several little "cheats" that are working really well for me (to share my experiences with some of you who can use them in the future). First of all, my mom recommended something called "Preggie Pops". These are suckers (you can get just lozenges, as well) that are naturally flavored--ginger, mint, sour lemon, etc.--and help to ease nausea. Though I had my doubts, I was shocked at how well they work. I would be just on the extreme edge of morning sickness in an inconvenient place (such as riding in the car), and would pop one of these in my mouth and begin to feel better almost immediately. The other fabulous product I have found is the "Tummy Sleeve" by Motherhood Maternity. This is simply a nylon spandex band that fits over your tummy and the top of your pants, so that when your waist no longer fits in your pants, you can still wear them unbuttoned with no one the wiser. In fact, it rather looks like you're simply layering. In the eleven-week picture below, I am wearing one. I have to say, I love the styles right now--they work so well with pregnancy! I've already gotten a couple of non-maternity shirts that are perfect for letting me grow. And my mother-in-law bought me my first maternity shirt the other day, and it's one I can wear from now until much farther along.
And now, for my musings on Corvallis. I never really thought about it, but I'm rather a minority here. There are perhaps a handful of people my age that are pregnant. It's nothing like Roseville, where people almost seem to go there to have kids. Rather, it is often difficult to find things available to pregnant moms around here. I have looked for water aerobic classes and other things, but the only pregnancy resources available are through the hospital. This is actually because it is a small college town. Because there are very few jobs available to those who graduate and want to remain in Corvallis (at least, very few well-paying jobs), most students leave right after college. Those who do return do so only after having children. On the other end of the spectrum, it seems as though the more educated the population, the higher the age of the parents when they have children. Having an enormous number of professors in town means that we have quite old parents. My doctor even made a comment on how people in Corvallis have children abnormally late. But when you have such high education, no one wants to let their schooling stagnate while they have kids, so they go into their field immediately and establish a career before having children. This does mean, however, that there are many activities going on for small children. So my kids will be highly stimulated, but I may have a hard time getting on with 40-year-old mothers of infants (and yes, I am absolutely serious). Oh, well. At least that means that I get more attention at the hospital. Without so much competition, I get great service! And, being the only one in our group of friends to be pregnant, I get lots of attention! (Who, me?) So, maybe this will be a boring post for those of you reading it, but it was an interesting time of musing for me!
P.S. For those of you wondering about my car, it's supposed to be in any day. The dealer called 10 days ago and said a week to 10 days. I'm having a difficult time with patience, though. I feel like praying and saying, "Lord, didn't we do this patience thing already? I'm okay--I don't need more of it!"

2007-04-03T15:45:00.000-07:00

So, today was an unexpectedly good day. Not really because the whole day was good, but, rather, a lot of little things. Things like driving across the railroad tracks and being the last car before the gates began to go down. And walking down the street and having a bum (yes, we have a few homeless people in Corvallis, though they're easy to get mixed up with the college students) stop me to tell me I had a beautiful smile. Then, music wise, my turn signal kept time with the radio at one point, they played a Reliant K song I loved (they certainly don't play enough of them), and then a Red song (which they never play)! So, anyway, it's been a fun day in Corvallis, where even the bums are friendly!
We finally started taking pictures of my belly (as you can probably tell from the picture). This is at week 11, and I'm just starting to show. Before, it was just that my waist had thickened, but now there is a small but distinguishable bump (Josh assures me that it doesn't look like I've gained weight, but rather that I am pregnant). The problem is that most of my clothes actually go to my waist, and now they aren't fitting right, as my waist is expanding! If I had longer shirts, I'd be fine with normal clothes for quite a bit longer, but as it is, I'm going to have to buy some long shirts. At least I can still wear those later!
Josh and I are starting a couple of classes this week. I knew I wouldn't last long in a college town without taking some. It's simply strange to be back in Corvallis and not be in school. However, I forgot how expensive it was! We're not in California anymore, Toto! We're taking the classes (a baby sign language one and a Spanish one) through the community college here, and that helps with the price. Not only that, but they are zero-credit classes. If we were to take a three or four credit class at OSU, it would be around $500 each! Even at the community college, it would be around $300 for both of us. There was a reason I never complained about tuition hikes in California! So, we compromised and chose the zero-credit classes, especially since they wouldn't help either of us with future schooling. But we're looking forward to them. The Spanish is great, because there has been mention of sending Josh and I to Barcelona for a few weeks to work with the team there sometime. Sounds great to me! World travel, here I come!

It's Really There!

2007-03-19T14:21:00.000-07:00

What a day! We had my first prenatal appointment today, and it was actually exciting. I wasn't expecting it, but they did an ultrasound already. There's something unreal about pregnancy until you actually see the baby and watch its heartbeat and little legs and arms moving around. If the ultrasound was any indication of personality, we will have a real show boater on our hands! The baby didn't move until it was in full view and clear on the screen, then it moved its arms and legs in what reminded me of Josh's happy dance (and if you haven't seen that, it's pretty cute)! If you have trouble making out the image, the baby's head is pointing down, and the light spot on the left is an arm. It's hard to see the rest at this size, but we could see arms and legs, and even watch the heartbeat. I actually feel pregnant now! Before, it kind of felt like there was just something wrong with me, with nothing to show for it.
Josh is so cute! Not only is he overprotective of me--the doctor did the normal female test, and he hadn't realized what it actually entailed, and ended up a little mad at the doctor--but he is obviously excited about the baby. He started his own blog (I'll put a link on the side of my blog), and he swears that I'm showing now. It's true, my waist is thicker and I can't suck my tummy in at all, but I've only gained half a pound!
In other news, Corvallis has been its wonderful springy self lately. (Okay, side note--just an example of how forgetful I am lately, I just had to look up the difference between it's and its--and I'm an English major! How pathetic is that?) The sun has been shining, the trees are all in bloom (especially the tulip trees on campus--I'll put in a picture of those later!), and the air smells fresh and fragrant. But today, the rain has returned. After a week of sun, it's not too bad; it just turns it into a movie day rather than a go out and conquer day. =) Well, I'm off to enjoy some ice cream--a reward for me for my minuscule weight gain, and a reward for Dante for his acrobatic dance.

Six More Weeks

2007-02-23T16:09:00.000-08:00

I am six weeks along today, and I thought I was having a relatively easy first trimester. Apparently more hormones (as if I didn't have enough of those mood-changing buggers floating around my body already) are flooding my system, and I'm becoming more forgetful, and more sick. Okay, yeah, I suppose my first indication that I was pregnant was bashing the truck into a pole, but it seems to have gotten worse. I left the house three times this past week without my purse, not realizing it until I arrived at wherever I was going. And worse yet, I've made it inside several stores, but left my money in the car. This is especially bad when grocery shopping. What do I do, park my cart and hope it stays?
But I think the worst thing at the moment is the morning sickness. I have to admit, I've still had it easy. But before, as long as I stayed away from sugar and dogs' denta-bones (go figure), I was fine. Now it's become a battle of whether or not I eat all day, since nothing sounds even remotely appetizing. Josh, in his attempts to help, asked what it was that I can eat--what things do sound good. I only have two things: anything potato, and banana bread. So, guess what my diet consists of! But I can't even make the things that do taste good, because cooking (and this is about torture) sounds even more repulsive than eating. So Josh is going to get his cooking experience (he offered!), and we may be eating out a lot, if I can find some healthy things (with potatoes, of course)!
I don't mean to simply complain--there is actually a lot about pregnancy that I do love. I love the attention (who, me?), and I love watching the pictures of how the baby is growing (especially the one that reminds me that my baby now has more brain cells than Paris Hilton--their words, not mine). I love planning the nursery and buying things that we obviously don't need yet, but are so excited over that we just can't wait. There is a lot that I love about this, but there is still that thing called pregnancy that we have to get through. Just six weeks until the first trimester is over, I keep reminding myself. Just six more weeks.

My Valentine

2007-02-21T15:27:00.000-08:00

So I haven't had a chance to write about what Josh did for me for Valentine's Day. The last couple of years, he's scored a lot of brownie points! This year, he gave me a card with a riddle in it (four lines of things we were going to do) and had me meet him for lunch. His first line sent us to a florist, where he had a bouquet of Gerber Daisies waiting for me. Then we walked to a downtown store to pick up a beautiful necklace he had gotten by an artist I have long admired, Michael Michaud. The necklace had a beautiful Eucalyptus leaf on it (Josh's favorite tree). Then his clues sent us down to a local tea shop for a seven course Valentine tea. It was wonderful (even though I was battling morning sickness)! His last clue was for the weekend. My love surprised me by taking me to Newport for a night on the Newport Belle, a riverboat B&B. We had luxurious accommodations in the bay front, with the Newport Bridge right out of our window (I'm still trying to figure out how to post Josh's pictures of it). I felt so spoiled by my Valentine!
So we spent our weekend touring the coast, ending up in Florence before heading back for home (the picture of us is from the Florence bay front). I also purchased my first piece of "fine art" (not including, of course, those pieces which have been created for me--I didn't purchase those). It is surprisingly delicate-looking metalwork figure called "Summer Novel"--a woman in a long dress and had reading a book in her lap. Again, I have to figure out how to post the pictures!
I feel as though my latest blogs have simply been an attempt to catch up with things that are going on with me, so I apologize if I have been droning on. Now that things seem to be leveling out again (it's amazing how much pregnancy can disrupt your life at times!), I will have to continue with the day to day, and put a little more personality in it. But for now, happy rainy day! (It's Oregon's liquid sunshine!)

Our News!

2007-02-16T15:46:00.000-08:00

Well, I feel like a bit of a putz. It's been almost three weeks since my last entry. I have an excuse, I really do. Well, actually, lots of them. But anyway, I have a little too much to say right now, and not much time to say it in. So I'll start with the important stuff first, and then I'll try to catch up next week!
We're pregnant. We found out about a week and a half ago, and my doctor confirmed it today. We found out a little early, due to my brain lapse--I hit the pole of the carport with the truck and made a nice dent in the bumper. Added to my week of simply being out of it, and a bit of nausea, Josh was a bit nervous for me, so he made me take a test--and it was positive. So now we have a truck with a bent bumper and a nice little story to tell our child! =) We're pretty excited about the whole thing (we already bought a baby sling), and so are our families, so it's a great situation all around!
I hate to make this entry so short, but I have a horribly messy house, and plans for the weekend. The Friday bug has bitten me!

Aaahh, Corvallis

2007-01-26T14:15:00.000-08:00

It's days like this that make me remember why I wanted so badly to return to Corvallis. The sun is shining, and it's a bit chilly (Yahoo says 36 degrees), but everyone is outside. I visited the Co-op today, and the smell was so comforting. I remembered days during college of waking up in the living room on Saturday mornings (we slept in sleeping bags out there on Friday so we could be woken up by the sun, which didn't come into our bedroom), heading out to the farmers' market and then off to the Co-op to get a yummy bread that would last us all day during studying, though the search in itself was an effort to put off the homework as long as possible. I can't wait until tomorrow, when Josh and I are planning to go hiking in the area. The weather makes me go into my hippie mood, and I want to throw on my sarong and head out to the garden!
We discovered a couple of places around town that are new since we were last here. The first is the Soup Shop on Monroe (for those of you who live around here). When we walked in, I felt for some reason that I was in a place in Berkeley. It definitely had the college grunge feel (but was certainly not dirty, by any means), and, like so many places in Corvallis, emphasized their organic food. We ordered chicken noodle soup and clam chowder--normally rather boring soups, right? But the clam chowder was heavy on the herbs and very low on the cream (very delicious), and the chicken noodle was the heartiest I'd ever seen. Definitely very different and highly recommended.
I've been going through Jamba Juice withdrawals since moving here, and, to my good fortune, a new smoothie store just opened up. It's called North Shore, and is located at the bottom of what was formerly Campus Inn (now G.E.M.). Wonderful place! Good prices, friendly owners, and several selections that DON'T CONTAIN BERRIES! What a thought! Hooray!
And now, Josh's personal favorite (I got him hooked last night): Peanut Butter Mochas at Bottom's Up (next to Bare Naked Tanning on Monroe, where the campus Book Bin used to be). Again, small hole in the wall, but was that drink ever good!
So yes, we've been having fun cruising around campus and the rest of the town. Tomorrow, it's off to tour the contryside. Here's to a sunshiny Corvallis weekend!

The Orange Dream Machine

2007-01-23T15:05:00.000-08:00

I came up with a name for my car today--The Orange Dream Machine. I'm not trying to copy Jamba Juice (though it is my favorite smoothie there), but it seemed quite applicable to this car. Besides, there aren't that many Jamba Juices in Oregon--the closest one is in Salem. So Josh and I are going to start looking around for window cling lettering to put up in the back window as soon as I get the car. I can't wait!
I have to say that I am currently loving my job. The sun came out for a few minutes today, and immediately, I was out on my front porch soaking it up and working (yes, that translates as reading. Like I said, I love my job!). Of course, the comforting warmth lasted only thirty minutes or so, but it was nice while it lasted. There's a reason that people come out in droves when it's sunny in Oregon--it just doesn't happen that often! I think when spring finally arrives, I'll take Bunny over to campus and lay out in the Quad and read just like in the college days. But for now, I'll soak up all the Vitamin D I can get! I'm reading Inkheart by Cornelia Funke for my reviews right now. It surprised me that I'm having a bit of trouble getting through it--it's simply taking longer than I realized. The way the kids rip through it, I thought I wouldn't be able to put it down. It is good, however, just not quite as engaging as I had anticipated. I did find out that the author is German, however. Go Germans! =)
Anyway, just wanted to share a bit of my sunshine!

What will I fit in my Fit?

2007-01-18T14:15:00.000-08:00

I have very exciting news (well, at least I'm very excited about it): I'm getting a new car! We went to the car dealer to order it on Tuesday. Due to the demand for the car (though you rarely ever see one), every dealer is completely sold out. Only the lot here in Corvallis held on to one model for test driving. So, in a couple months, I am going to have my new, ORANGE, manual, sporty little Honda Fit! If you haven't ever seen one (which I'm actually betting on), here is a look: click here. Now, you may know that Josh and I were in the market for a family car, and looking at a Passat Wagon. However, due to the astronomical price and horrible gas mileage, we began to look elsewhere. The more we looked around, the more I wanted a sporty car, figuring that I have plenty of time to get old and drive a sedan, or even a Subaru. I was in the market for sporty. But try matching up "sporty" and "family", plus "room for dog", and there is very little out there. So, anyway, the Fit fit our budget and lifestyle, gets great gas mileage (which I feel ever more guilty about with the truck, due to gas prices and polution), and is sporty and cute. If I'm going to be a mom someday, I'm going to be a fun mom!
So Corvallis is still under snow! We had a pretty bad ice storm up in Portland, and we got enough of it here that hardly anyone went into work at Josh's work on Tuesday. Most worked from home, and of the handful (quite literally) who tried to make it in, at least two or three ended up in small accidents. No one was injured, but I was glad Josh had decided to stay home! On the news they showed very entertaining (only because no one was hurt, just stupid) videos of people trying to drive down Salmon Street in Portland--when it obviously wasn't driveable. It was a little fun, I have to admit, to watch people who believed their SUV's actually were made for inclement weather, go spinning gracefully, or perhaps not so gracefully, down the hill. But we all know how much I love SUV's, anyway! If you want to see the video, here it is: Portland weather. The firetruck that comes in at the end to close off the street was later hit by two more cars.
Well, that's the news here. We're beginning to thaw out, and I'm grateful to have a little more warmth. I'm not used to this cold after the California sun!

My new goal--and SNOW!

2007-01-12T16:33:00.000-08:00

It's been awhile since I used this blog for anything. Now that I have an outlet for my original goal (in www.bookmom.net), I can now feel free to use this as a creative outlet as well as keeping in touch with everyone back in California.
I've been enjoying my time back in Oregon, getting to spend time with family and friends again. I've also loved rediscovering all my old haunts around school and the whole area. So this will be my way of staying in touch and showing my love and rediscovery of my beloved Corvallis.
Well, it snowed again in Corvallis, for the second time since we've been here. This time, however, we had more and it has stayed for longer. With the excitement of snow, I had to share it with those who would love it as much as I do: the kids. So I called up Josh's mom and she brought the kids over. The four of us, and, of course, Bunbury, walked to Walnut Park (10 minutes from my apartment) and played in the snow. We got to go sledding, have snowball fights, and make a snowman. And talk about your faithful dogs! When I let Bunny off leash, he was excited to see all the other dogs there, and would barely obey me for his excitement. However, he climbed the hill with us every time, and whenever I went sledding, he would run alongside all the way down!
So I am loving Corvallis covered in snow, and loving the festive atmosphere it brings with it. Tonight, I'm off to my college roommate's house to watch scary movies and tell each other ghost stories just like the old days.

My new project

2006-06-15T18:02:00.000-07:00

A new project has rather dropped in my lap today. I've decided to create a review of children's books in an effort to increase parents' ability to be involved in their children's learning process, as well as to know what their children are reading. Thus, for a time this blog will be devoted to books--a perfect reflection of me! From my work in a bookstore, and through my studies in my senior seminar, it has become painfully apparent that most parents have little or no idea what their children are reading--not only what is assigned in school, but also what kids are reading on their own. Parents make the mistake quite frequently of only monitoring scholastic reading rather than discretionary, and this is where the danger lies. I am a firm opponent to censorship, but I believe that a responsible parent knows what his or her children are putting into their heads.
Along the same lines, there are many books that are contested and challenged out there (as nothing is ever banned, since banning books is against the first amendment) that are actually very good for children, and these books need an advocate--namely, me. My goal is not to influence anyone's opinion about the books I review, but rather to help parents and perhaps teachers and conscientious kids make educated, informed decisions about children's literature. This is perhaps one of the most misunderstood areas of literature out there, while also the most crucial, and thus it has become my passion. What can I say, I root for the underdog! The writing in children's literature may be more simplistic than many adult books (and actually, some are quite beautiful in their language), but the messages are not. The information and imagination contained between the pages of the best of these are very important for children in allowing their minds to grow, and in raising children who are able to think for themselves.
I plan to begin with children's books that I have read (which will take awhile just at that), and make an attempt to first cover award winners and popular books, as well as those commonly taught in the classroom, in an effort to make my site as helpful as possible. I want to give an objective look at the books I review, but also contain a sidebar with my own personal opinion, so that those who know me and trust my discretion may be able to make decisions based on my input. Again, my effort is not in censorship. Going to high school with a librarian who went through every book and crossed out the swear words--in classic literature, no less--incensed me and made me realize that there must be a better way than to either censor things or than to read until I found something objectionable. I hope this site helps, and I hope that through it we can raise a generation of children who we are unafraid to allow to read great books, a generation of great writers and thinkers that can give us hope for the future.

2006-01-23T17:57:00.000-08:00

Furtwangler Paper

Starting

2006-01-23T12:50:00.000-08:00

First Post!